breathing the motorway

lace up your shoes,

2010-07-04T08:31:00.003+08:00

(Cant believe how much i've grown)

I havent been here for so long, havent had the time to post in my old roundabout-and-only-makes-sense-to-me way for so long, its almost as if someone else, another girl in her own entirety, had this blog for 4 years.

But it all has to end, somehow. All chapters have to have a full stop, and similarly, this will probably be the last post i'll ever post here. I know its cliche, moving on just because you want to keep a part of your life closed and locked away, safe, but that's what i'm going to do anyway. Because cliches only exist if you're brave enough to conform (oh, the irony), and well, sometimes conformity can be a way of standing out too.

This part of me will always be in my memories, i promise. I wont be deleting this, because it charts some of the best, worst, funniest, first time experiences i've had during my high school years. And it has all my links too (-: I might come back every so often to read this, really, just because.

I've moved somewhere, but leave me a message on my tagboard (its linked to my new tagboard on the new blog, so i can see everything still :)) or contact me somehow, i'll tell you where to go.
I'm just not linking it here in case there are odd stalkers lurking around :/

So i guess this has to be goodbye- With love, and thanks<3

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
you can be my almost valentine

You could curl up inside the fishtank to sleep

2010-03-11T19:59:00.004+08:00

Feels so nice to be able to walk back in the day for a change (:

These days are filled with laughter, sweat, and tears. These days are made up of joys and heartbreaks, of stoning at CT benches with the wind on our backs, of thinning wallets (and so i've learnt-- lecture notes are a wallet's best diet pills), of entering lecture theatres under arctic- like temperatures, of late nights, of sleepy assemblies.

Rehearsals are going along pretty fine i guess, though I most definitely can be better, awrr. Its less than a month away hey, we can do it, i know we can. Twentyten is ours to write, and i know we'll be more than amazing, love :-)

I really hope i stay this way for sometime longer, because this is the kind of peace i've been searching for during all the hard nights of weeks past. I need to tie a knot and hold on, to continue to stay strong, not because i know i've been through worse, but because i know the worst is yet to come.

So let mercy come:

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
When was the last time you did something for the first time?

i've got my mind open open close-

2010-02-07T15:36:00.003+08:00

10'OG13 (the lovely wet games specialist) & 10A16 & Ares!
Its been a truly bubbly one and a half weeks, the kind of bubbly you get by throwing out your arms to spin around with the wind against your face and feeling like you're about to fly:

- Meteor showers and mass 1line text replies
- A certain penguin wearing a helm(et) on a certain red flag ;)
- Uniform crossdressing!
- Tap tap tap tap full turn tap tap half turn tap *ow my foot
- War games! *cue to snarl in a cavewomenlike way
- Ad Infinitum finale! (cues human rollercoasters and sticky bodies)
- and so
- much
- more

Its like drinking butterbeer(:

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
I hope we'll stay happy, love

Jay eh ee, oh my jay eh ee.

2010-01-31T14:55:00.001+08:00

Havent cried this suddenly for so long, but anyway, anyhow.
(:, because my heart's too tired to feel anything else.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
tomorrow will know more than today/

clasp a prayer within,

2010-01-25T00:27:00.003+08:00

i tell you nothing that is everything, even if you may think everything i say to be nothing. I know you hear the words that i speak, but more importantly, tonight i need you to listen to the things i dont say.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.

Ride that crescendo, frou frou, cause pain can only rise so high.

(untitled)

2010-01-19T23:06:00.003+08:00

I bury my face in your pillow (the one i never

washed) and scream my loneliness

into something tangible, like tears. The satin cover

is wrapped around my eyes so tightly

i can see nothing but the heavy curtain of

grey behind my shuttered lids.

The darkness pries open my lips,

amplifying the monotony of my

breaths and spreading them all all all

over the creases of our bedsheet,

in all all all directions of the room. As though

breaking the silence would prevent my heart

from breaking. Since something has to break

anyway.

its been two years and four days since

Poisedon took you away

and tonight (like all the other

nights) i need more than just me-

mories

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.

you should've waited for my goodbye

Curl your toes:

2010-01-11T21:21:00.002+08:00

Whoopedums half of it is over now, and i'm just blissfully glad :-)

I remember all the hard nights, of which the most vivid memory was entering slumberland at 2am with the edges of my pillow still wet with tears, cause well... (if you dont know, then you dont need to know(: ) And then there was the writing pages after pages of lit notes, the most outstanding personal achievement being the completion of 20 full pages of WR (or was it MSND?) and running dry 2 new pens (heh heh:D). Those were the crazy days.

Then it was whambam 3 weeks of scurrying in and out of school nervously cramming last minute bits of info into our heads and mass praying in the hall and riding buses home only to hide my head under the covers and cry (*twice only, i swear) and bathing while reciting history/ss/bio facts aloud!

-I should add i cant really remember much about stalin now (Hitler's my fav:D) except for this odd bit about him killing 17 million horses to force farmers to use tractors instead. And turns out there werent enough tractors, silly poom-.-

-Nor can i remember much about potassium (lilac flame, group 1) or the stomach (distensible bag, pyloric sphincter) or the CRO (Freq=1/Period). Okay fine i do. HAHA.

But i digress, again. The whole point of this post was to go: :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D fwooshyippeeyaywhoohoo!

That's all, really.

And so i've learnt-- the dark horses should never be afraid, because sometimes one jump might be all it takes to fly.

Thank you <3

c'est le ton qui fait la musique

oh oh, we're halfway there, we're living on a prayer.

Happy twentyten :-)

2010-01-08T19:33:00.001+08:00

Class chalet was a whizzbang!

Somehow, with graceys around, nothing turns dull... Or quiet, for that matter :D

Mornings were spent rolling about the bed in a decidedly drunken fashion/ snugging up on the downstairs mattresses trying to find a comfortable spot among the sea of heads and legs/ attempting to watch tv but finding our hands reaching for the wii games after a minute

Afternoons were spent playing guitar/band hero, getting free admission to serene+sufang's rock concert/ renting lousy bikes from the reception and cycling 17 k with the winds on our backs/ swimming and dripping chlorine all over the floor

Nights were spent barbuecing: setting the foilwrapped corn and potatoes on fire by accident, charring the otahs, boiling sausages/ watching tv and then progressing rather inevitably to wii *i think that was the point when i dislocated my shoulder while smashing the vball one too many times :-)/ jumping on beds and just talking and laughing

This post has no full stops, simply because something so fun should never have had to end, love (:

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.

shouldn't have had to chain happiness again/

手指间的回忆:

2009-12-30T23:25:00.004+08:00

好久没有用华语写作了。

摘自赵凯《水仙花开》：

你要等到水仙花开/ 看那水中盛放朵朵洁白

你要等着我回来/ 回来给你最真的爱

我会等到水仙花开/ 阵阵清香洋溢在我脑海

你那无瑕的洁白/ 是我为你种的未来

我已经把你的精彩/ 化成记忆随身携带

我要化身一朵紫罗兰，乘风追赶阳光的翅膀；

让风吹散心中的惆怅，陪伴着我找一个属于我的地方，

寻找一个没有泪水的天堂。

新年快乐，我要快乐，我们总会快乐的。

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
我就是你忠实的园丁，即使你宁可自由自在呼吸那一窗星星

let in snow let it snow let it snow <3

2009-12-28T22:03:00.003+08:00

Christmas is *officially* over.
And is unofficially continuing right into day3 :D

I have a feeling 2010 will be really, really different. It may be for better, or for w___ (haha i'm not saying it cause i'm not taking the risk of jinxing the year), but i'm choosing to believe the former.
A little optimism here and there (and everywhere :D) can be healthy for the soul.

This year i found quiet strength in hope, newfound optimism amongst the laughters, made crazy memories in between days, discovered steely will when the tears came, and recovered faith with hugs.

So bring on the new year, cause sticks and stones are never going to break me.
I've got a pocketful of sparkleshine : )

Merry christmas, with lots of snow and love.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
close your eyes and just dive, you need to fly to feel alive.

hush little baby dont you cry.

2009-12-25T21:09:00.003+08:00

if tomorrow i lie down bleeding
life ebbing away on the floor
would you stay to keep me breathing
or carry on fighting outside the door

>Please, wont you stay
I wont know if I'll live through today
All i need is a comforting face
For me to forget the horror of this place

Block the sound of bullets screaming from my ears
Cradle me in your arms and wipe my tears
Tell your comrades to hold on, wait
Let her feel the peace's silence before its too late

Please, stay and stop the pain
Tell me all this is just a game
That I'll live not to die another day
but to wake up to everything okay

Sincerely yours,
You dont need to know my name.

#
He's going away after bandaging her bulletridden legs.. no, you cant go away-- Stay, please stay, hold me like how daddy did once before the bullets took him away... He's saying something about her being fine but its all wrong its all wrong oh why wont he stop and hold her a moment and lend her a shoulder what's wrong everything's wrong everything's war torn

I'm only thirteen and girls my age dont celebrate birthdays with shrapnel as their birthday cake dont countdown in time with the sound of bombs dropping they're supposed to be happy and not bleeding they're not supposed to lose their brother on their birthday

Oh. She now knows why he went away: He went to help another kid with bulletridden legs.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
You were always the sours to my skittles/

only the heart can feel.

2009-12-20T13:29:00.002+08:00

Found these on dionne the sexiee's blog!

# I miss mugging, really. To the extent that when i saw this soundwave exhibition in hk's science musuem, i found myself mentally revising greater amplitude= louder sound & greater frequency= higher pitch & period= 1/freq and whatnot.

Having one of those "i want to wear my sn peshirt" days! :-)

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.

"i thing, it felt smoooth" is one of my alltimefavs now;)

Why dont you dare to look in a mirror?

2009-12-10T16:56:00.001+08:00

When the flash of annoyance seared through me, i saw, so clearly, in my mind's eye: why i never really liked you; which subsequently led me to understand why you never liked me, either.

I have observed you observing me for so long that dislike itself has gathered dust and contempt having chosen to fade into oblivion. I gradually grew immune to your everchanging personalities--- you changed masks with a frequency that could rival that of a chameleon's, with each one customed to mould seamlessly to your face.

A lioness will be at her fiercest not when she is hungry, but when she is protecting her cubs. With this theory, i repeat. Dont even try to mess with what i love most, please, because when push comes to shove i might blow.

And i would hate to spatter you with bits of my eye/ hair/ toe.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.

"she dare not lie near this lack-love, this kill- courtesy"

you have to go there to come back

2009-12-02T15:25:00.004+08:00

i think today will be the kind of day that you like best.

Lazy and dim. The field full of daffodils bending to whisper their secrets to the wind, and the gray skies heavy with the promise of tears, yet never yielding them to earth's gravity. Well- not yet, anyway.

There are days like this when i think of you (back in 1860), with your cherry hairpins and muslin skirt, braiding flower wreaths with me at the field. Sometimes we would have a braiding race, and more often than not you would win- i've always harbored this secret suspicion that you got fairies to help you- but later when the sky grew somber and night fell you would crown me with an armful of wreaths before we skipped home, saying "A queen always has to look ready for her king to come and take her away for her happily ever after!"

I had laughed at the sheer absurdity of any king finding (much less falling in love with) either one of us in the countryside, had poked fun at your vivid imagination and your unwavering belief in happily ever afters. Yet not once did i stop to think that maybe, just maybe, your imagination was there to hide the fact that you so desperately wanted to fit in somewhere.

5 years later high school came and high school gone. Lou was still Lou, and Lisa the same; but the only difference was that Lou was going to the city with Ian and never coming back. Lou still had her sun-bleached blond locks and Lisa her dark curls, but the difference was that Lou had sparkly Bonnebelle barrettes while Lisa still used gingham ribbons. Lou was too caught up in her world of parties to notice that the more lipgloss tubes she bought, and the more boys she dated, the space for Lisa in her life grew smaller and smaller.

Lisa didn't send Lou off the day she left, but instead holed up in her room to look at kiddy pictures of them both, arms wrapped around each other with rays of sunlight caught between their eyelashes. Try as she might, she could only picture a vague outline of Lou's face when she told Lisa that they would be best friends "forever and always".

However, I could no longer see the staunch conviction in your face when i made you pinkie- promise that our forever would never end.

Its raining here. I wonder if the sky is crying where you are now.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.

but don't expect me to be waiting by the railtracks

of high heels and video stills/ of sleeping at 4am and waking up feeling like grumpy the dwarf

2009-11-22T23:30:00.001+08:00

disclaimer: my pictures have yet to be posted on facebook simply because my mum's camera cable requires some excavating around the house, so.

i will remember prom because i was finally able to totter around showing off my *fake long eyelashes.

i will remember it for the camera flashes and shutter clicks, for the silly masks and excruciating waits (both for the rehearsal and the VIP arrival!).

i will remember it because that was the night i sang the school song and said the school pledge as a bluebadge for the last time.

this post is so short because tonight is not the night for words, silly. it is a night for the heart to remember <3

i will remember grad- night (22112009) because that was part magic, part love, and 100 % SN.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.

let mercy come.

pinafore on for the last time:

2009-11-14T21:56:00.004+08:00

i think "over" is too short a word to sum up the momentous journey that i've gone through, and "OVER!!!!!!" too conspicuous/cliche, so, in my usual beating-around-the-bush way i shall just say:

the runners are leaving.

some with bodies sagged in relief, some with heavy hearts, some with pinafore belts cinched too tight... and if you look hard enough there'll also be those with 3 blue letters clearly visible above the tops of their shoebacks.

i think i'll spend the rest of tonight marvelling at the power of the human will. joy was right, sheer will can carry you through everything AND anything, but then again, no one guaranteed fair weather for the journey. granted, we complained (Oh, the grumbles we made would put chatterboxes to shame :D ) and ranted and cried and lost a tiny bit of faith and hated the textbooks and yet still sat down to study anyway.

i guess its customary for me to list down the things i'll miss, especially when the school moves out, to list significant events that i mark my 4 years in SN by, and to thank people. but this time i'll leave that out of this post, because, really.

how do you say i love you to a school that has given you so much love it could last you a lifetime?

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.

of father barre, assemblies on the track and family dances

we could scatter stardust by the meadow-

2009-11-10T20:45:00.006+08:00

昨夜的雨惊醒我沉睡中的梦

迷惑的心缠满着昨日的伤痛

冷冷的风不再有往日的温柔

失去的爱是否还能够再拥有

漫漫长路谁能告诉我

究竟会有多少错何处是我最终的居留

曾经在雨中对我说今生今世相守

曾经在风中对我说永远不离开我

多少缠绵编织成的梦

多少爱恨刻划的镜头

为何一切到了终究还是空

#我依稀记得我小时候回到外婆家，睡在外公外婆的房间里时，心里总会有种踏实的

感觉. 那种感觉伴着我对他们的爱，伴着一丝丝的甜蜜，流入我的心田里。

那种缠绵与心的感觉，小时候的我，很珍惜。

可是，也许上天妒忌了我与他们（特别是外公）那份深厚的感情，或是对我们祖孙俩

之间的爱看红了眼，它决定这个让我沉醉的幸福，不能变成永久。

十四年了，我仍会在夜深人静的时候忆起你的。

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
the very very last curve to dash for

salvage the lost, save the empty.

2009-10-15T12:25:00.002+08:00

You never said goodbye
Someone tell me why
Did you have to go
And leave my world so cold
Everyday I sit and ask myself
How did love slip away
Something whispers in my ear and says
That you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though you're far away
I am here to stay

You;re not alone.

granted, i was too young to understand death then (as much as i do now), but i swear that that tiny seed of sorrow was always rooted in my heart. always. i just buried it alongside my memories of you and every once in a while, whenever i was lonely and alone, hold it close.

when i was growing up, mom used to say that if you were still around, i would be the luckiest kid on earth. i believed her.

i still do.

please?

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
& fighters' hearts are made from tears.

& everyone needs a pocketful of sunshine

2009-09-25T17:40:00.004+08:00

Flight:

how big you make it, depends on how far you take it.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.

there are souls too heartless to make dreams fly

eyes too wet to even try.

calling a dreamer/

2009-09-23T08:16:00.004+08:00

you dont believe no more (you dont even sleep no more)
i like this silence, where when one is enveloped by stillness. slow breaths come by default, becoming mandatory-
havent been breathing slow for a long time, aye.

so its over, its finally over; and like all other endings this one will mark a beginning.
this may have ended, but in fact its just a start-end-rewind sequence, looped twice to test the strength of the human heart.

by heart, i dont mean the one with coronary arteries.
its the one we wear on our sleeves, darling:

the paperthin one.

dream no more (you dont even dream no more)
You'll never complete a backflip if you dont turn yourself upside down.
Well, then.

see you on the flipside (;

dreamer, dreamer (why dont you just dream again)
choreographed chorus 1:
swing- fedora- heartbeat
1 1/2 twist-open-turn
fame's ending-right hand up/ close- cross- isolation x2
turn-floor- sweep left leg up, hold
left swing 1,2- flutterby- stop.

c'est le ton ui fait la musique.
the anthem of my mind.

stiffen that upper lip-

2009-07-16T19:21:00.007+08:00

要勇敢，真的.

擦干眼泪站起来。

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.

and to think that the fierce vexation of a dream was always the fundamental of one's courage.

the length of our promise:

2009-06-06T21:08:00.001+08:00

and ps/

au revoir-
(indefinitely i guess, but i'll drop by every twice in a while, promise.)
cross 2 fingers?

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
will miss.

four days will quickly steep themselves in night

2009-06-06T15:50:00.004+08:00

with jubilate absolutely lovely, i was left quite drained, wondering, what other things in the year ahead would fill me up so giddily with love, then leave me to remember-- after its all over, everything that had mattered(:

You never know where the next miracle is gonna come from, the next smile,
the next wish come true. But if you believe that it's right around the corner,
and you open your heart and mind to the possibility of it, to the certainty of
it. You just might get the thing you're wishing for. The world is full of magic.
You just have to believe in it.

so i closed my eyes first june 2009 midnight and said:
hey, may this journey be a perfact one.

for four days we roamed the compounds of hc like home, facshirts/uniforms molded to bodies like a second skin, so saturated with the magic of slc, the love of us. i found warmth in new people- the air in classrooms 504 507 510 was hot and heavy, but i soon became accustomed to it as i floated in and out of them over 4 days, icebreaking, instructing, debriefing, watching. i was the one they knew but not quite properly, the one standing behind laptops surveying action papers' progresses, the one scribing for YCMs, the he-ad-fac.

>OG was crazy with nick kenji kahmun, we were on a high ourselves :D and watching the flour specks shimmy off my shirt as i jumped around, i was stunned by the bubbles of laughter stuck in my throat: how long has it been since i last was so happy?

the universe has no cosmic rule that commands time to slow down once something magical starts, no; it hurtles by instead, pushing days past us in a blur, until we're done catching our breaths and find that all it leaves in its wake are the goodbyes.

>i remember the way we facsqueezed at random times of the day just for the thrill of it(or of course, the announcing of important events yes), the way we would sit on the giant steps of the concourse together, legs dangling and eyes fixed on the slc banner fluttering in the breeze, fixing a dream onto each square and watch it soar high, high, high

>i will never look at the steps near lt2 quite the same way again, who would, after sitting on them with the rest of us each day after debriefs? nothing in hc looks quite the same to me again, if you ask, because i am so silly to believe that if i walk along corridors of the classroom block and listen hard enough, i will hear the voices of us, of them, shuttersounds and quiet discussions entwined. and i am even sillier to believe that if i ever sit in the high school audi one afternoon again, i might just be able to hear the cheerings of yesterday, the music everyone used, and most importantly, see the faces:fragile as haze, like the form memories always appear in.

impossible, but i still believe anyway.

the perFACt FACulty: forty of us so different as individuals, so seamlessly united as one. thank you, all of you, for all the convos we had/will have, all the crazy moments we shared and everything that we will remember.for letting me grow so much over the four days. for letting me love so hard and be loved. because forgetting is never an option, this fierce passion we have, it'll burn on.

15slc. perFACtion. <3

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
four nights will quickly dream away the time

our last sprintable stretch

2009-05-21T20:25:00.002+08:00

i think that this might be, (will this be?) one of the last times i'll be here, till the year closes, though i'll come by every twice in a while to let what i've become talk to what i've been, promise.

} so today i ran 2.4 alone in the morning 'cause venue testing clashed with pe, then i suddenly realised how odd it was running without R,J,E etc. to pace myself with. it was that sudden flash of insecurity, of worry, as i came down the stairs-- that made me realise how much yguys mean to me. i mean, running together became a norm we didnt plan, we just settled into the various routines so comfortably it was as though everything was chereographed, and that was the beauty of it, the beauty of security of support of invisible spontaneity.

then i ran, and i thought of how we all have our own places to go, our own niches to carve after we take off our bluebadges for the last time, and i felt.

:/. (if my heart had a face)
will miss all of you, we'll survive this somehow, anyhow- blind faith (:/

}Jubilate 2009: last performance for the graduating year,
and we'll do ourselves proud. it's now less than 24 hours to the moment where the curtains swoosh shut and the lights dim and we scurry to our places like frightened mice in the dark (blue wash, high intensity, downstage center); and i guess at this point there is nothing left to say except.

thank you, and good luck.
of course we will be nervous, the baby butterflies always come the night before and turn into fully matured ones on the day itself :D but i know that (i believe that) once the light/sound cues start and the lines are spoken, everything will sparkle into place, flawless. we will huddle backstage after that twenty minutes, emotional, but only because the whole thing was so beautiful it could make one cry.

ESCAPARSE- this is all my love for you.

well alright i guess its goodbye for now then-- so see you on the other side, love.
[ps/ see, i'm no different either, i think of the what- ifs sometimes too.]

c'est le ton qui fait la musique
i'm letting the daisies go.

(a+b) (a-b)

2009-04-24T21:08:00.003+08:00

En Ma Fin Est Ma Commencement:

Does this darkness have a name? This cruelty? This hatred? How did it find us? Did it steal into our lives or did we seek it out and embrace it? What happened to us? That we now send our children into the world like we send young men to war, hoping for their safe return, but knowing that some will be lost along the way. When did we lose our way? Consumed by the shadows, swallowed all by the darkness. Does this darkness have a name? Is it your name?

[1treehill ep316]

from the heart;
i will buy you a plane ticket and set you free, to the lands of the meadows where the only sound you here is the whispering of dandelions, and the only pain you feel is that caused by the grass- tops poking your ankles.

i will get you the prettiest dress, the one flushed in midnight blue, and take you to the patio. i will dance with you there and then, i will let you step on my feet, and i will twirl you round and round in time's absence.

i will bring you a bouquet and a letter on your favorite day, with a hug that encompasses everything that needs not be spoken, and i will write the letter in code, even if it takes me ages to form the decodes- just to see your face light up when you break the seal.

i will hold on to your shoes when you chase after your dreams, so that if you fall i will break it for you, and then-
i will tell you that i have always believed in you.

so hey wenyi, keep on smiling?

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
the world keeps spinning in a silent scream/and we keep waking in these dying dreams

navy blues and perfect whites

2009-04-23T20:00:00.000+08:00

B' silver/ C' gold.

all the dead throats were completely worth it, SN, we did it!
we were awfully ecstatic for y'all, trackers ;D
i am so proud of you.

stnicks:
you made us proud of you, and in october the dark blues will make you proud of us, too.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique
flushed faces and raw hearts

breathless sway

2009-04-10T22:44:00.002+08:00

i'll remember that moment/

which made the world and time and surroundings fuse into one: (warm fuzz)
silence
punctuated only by breathing hearts

for all that's left unspoken the soul will feel

thus there is
no full stop but instead commas
'cause i'd never want anything like this to end.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
the sun shines tonight

in the span of one question?

2009-04-01T17:50:00.004+08:00

yesterday i was sneaking a subway onto the bus, stealing a bite every once so often when the bus revved past unpopulated areas, eyes darting about furtively like a fugitive's, guilt staining the edges of my mouth.

i was sitting beside an open window, the one on the left i remember, and the wind was tumbling through my hair. we were passing under a bridge (somewhere near Adam road, i think) when i bit another mouthful of honeyoat bread ham bacon turkey cucumber tomato lettuce, and at the exact moment i pulled away: a gust of summer blew right in, suspending the crumbs into a sudden swirl before they fell- ever so gently- to the ground. like dancers, so fluid. so smoothly.

for the third part of a minute, i thought of this
could that be defined as beauty in an instant?
#

nine to nine fifteen in SN is never sleepy, so long as there's food around(:
so today i was halfway between a handful of cheese goldfishes and trying to memorize (for the upteenth time) what were the key driving forces of globalization when someone -i forgot who- passed back the packet and said

"i like the original one better."

i was chewing as i heard her say this, and suddenly the saltiness in my mouth was gone, replaced with this sense of tasteless emptiness that settled in between teeth and didnt go away till recess. no, dont get me wrong. i have nothing against cheese fishes really, i think they're equally nice as the originals, but at that particular moment, my thoughts just fused into one line

is this what change tastes like? so empty, so hollow?

and if this holds true,
when people change, do they turn hollow inside?
#

today i was queueing for waffles after school, 'cause, there's comfort in peanut butter everytime.

then i saw the lady scraping the crusted crumbs off the edge of the waffle maker with a flat sort-a spoon. scrappp, scrappp, the spoon went, its silver edges glinting in the afternoon sun like how the teeth of a murderer gleams in the dark of a bedroom before he slices his bloody finale. for reasons that i am completely unable to fathom, my heart was aching for those fallen crumbs, lying so pitifully crumpled at the base of the stove

so this is how easily one can be wrenched apart?

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
for all those for whom today is brokenhearted day,

emotions you have come to fear the most

2009-03-24T20:19:00.003+08:00

"i am rootless, i am wrenched
i do not know where i stand"

Sometimes pain becomes such a huge part of your life that you expect it to always be there, because you can't remember a time in your life when it wasn't. But then one day you feel something else, something that feels wrong, only because it's so unfamiliar. And in that moment you realize you're happy.

Happiness comes in many forms. In the company of good friends, in the feeling you get when you make someone else's dream come true, in the folds of love, or in the promise of hope renewed. It's okay to let yourself be happy, because you never know how fleeting that happiness might be. <3/

funny how t's so easy, so natural to love those we love,
and yet find it so hard to have faith in ourselves:
we ask, dont we- how long more till the night bleeds into day again?

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
so few come and lesser stay

shh, just watch the fireworks,

2009-03-20T01:49:00.002+08:00

Most of our life is a series of images. They pass us by like towns on the highway, like how trees move backwards as you gaze out of a car window, like how the wind sluices through your hair and curls the tendrils of grass at meadow's edge before sweeping away, away, away. But sometimes, a moment stuns us as it happens, and we’ll know that this instant is more than a fleeting image: we know that this moment, every part of it, will live on forever.

so tonight the albums were finally dug out, and opened, and laughed at and squealed over/

and i found myself missing myself.
i looked at the girl (virtually hairless, though you didnt need to know that) in a red sundress sitting on the swing smiling, the same one with flowers in her hair and hands wrapped around a lamppost one 1997 night, one who had two-toned jeans and a graphic swimsuit *hey karl lagerfeld would be proud ;D, and the same one looking very very curiously at the camera lenses, a year old, {one who declared, through a toothy grin at the camera(wo)man, that people's arms are the next best place to home.} and felt this stirring within the depths of my heart, some place long forgotten.

it was the innocence of a child i was missing,
the bubbly kind of happiness that one gets from believing everything as it seems, from holding hands with calloused palms and knowing that if you fall there's always someone to hug you, to pull you back up, give you a rose and lead you to the path's end.

i was missing what i used to have.

so give me 1998, with pigtails and a smile, hugs and a red penguin on the couch, with banana splits and weekend- swims,
all/over/again.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
got me in a haze, i'm running for cover

all tomorrow's parties

2009-03-20T00:52:00.002+08:00

funniest since yesterday's yesterday-

(where the topic was on the disposal of your remains after you've died), dad mentioned something about how he should just post the pictures of him and mum on the 'net, so everytime my sis'tr and i logged on we could pray to them, yknow, seeing how technologically- advanced the world's getting.
whoa haha it was so hilarious i nearly fell off my chair, and that's not even anywhere close to an understatement :D

then came the highlight of the conversation,*and t'was the best part, really:
mum to the two of us: eh when you see nice bags must tell me in your prayers, alright!
}and after a moment of stunned silence
i said: so we're supposed to stand in the middle of an LV boutique and start praying?

HEY its okay if you dont burst your corneas laughing, cause i did! :)

c'est le ton qui fait la musique!
everyday is a sunday evening, every moment is a breath in taking.

ours and yours

2009-03-16T23:12:00.002+08:00

for all the people who made black friday so much, much more bearable<3

for R:
you've been such a dear really, with catnaps in class and our dramamoments and whatnots, i'm so sorry if i frightened you that day aye(: i didnt mean to cry, i swear i didnt, though well, crouching down in the aisle between your seat and zhiyi's, i guess everything just kind'a became a little too overwhelming:/ thank you for stuffing me with tissues at my most vulnerable, for insisting on accompanying me to the toilet even though physics was about to start, for standing around outside the cubicle door and talking to me non-stop though it was pretty evident i was too choked-up to reply, and most of all, for just being there :) here's to love, dear; we have our motiv workshop promise to live up to(:

for J:
your kinderbueno toy distracted me for half of physics : O but still you really really made my day *once? twice? yknow when you said:"but i wished i had saved it for you instead", & "it would have benefited the world for yours to be in it" (okay i dont think it would have aha but i'm really glad you liked it cause its one of my personal favs :)) you made me TEAR. seriously. maybe t'was just the aftermath of being on an emotional rollercoaster, but still. you were awfully sweet, and i'm sorry i was such a wreck that day *no i won't go all mushy on you here, but maybe one day when i get around to learning french i'll write one whole book of pick up lines to tide you through your saddie moments, aye:)

for YQ:
hahaha we always seem to have the craziest moments in school dont we ;) thank you for leaning against the cubicle door and talking to me that day too*hug and so the term closes with me remembering all the times we exchanged post-its whenever one of us was having a frizzy day, i still have all those colored notes stuck in my SD hey. you're one of the best dears, really, i think the day'll feel pretty different without trying to avoid your pokes, ha. here's to aiming to get in X together so we can continue our pokings, alright?

for E:
aye i know its really really rare (note the triple alliteration you lovely lit student) for you to hug someone, really i do. but danke for choosing to give me one that day, it helped (even if for a while) i guess with 74 rides twice each week there's pretty much nothing left to say(out loud), you'd know all my crappings by now wont you :) i would say thank you for everything, but that's pretty cliche for an einstein isnt it, so here goes *and deniseN would be proud: dankesschon, meine freundi, love.

for PJ (R):
my thanks go beyond the chocolate-muffin-cake ;) i'll remember all our midnight rendezvouses at the marriott and the silly discussions about who would end up with J/P for the night, though i forget how long this delightful nonsense has been going on, really, but lets keep it up till Os alright, 'ts pretty lovely to have something to laugh over each lit lesson aha. i hope i can be as much of a dear as you've been to me, really*hug [ps: funnily enough i can still remember the exact situation when we first talked, you helped me with the report cards, remember?] thank you for making that horrid friday a little less unlucky and a little more cakey, x.

for S:
yknow your text made me cry (a little) on the bus, silly :) but hey you've always been one to cheer me up with all sorts of funky lines and disgustingly cheesy pickups and such, though i know i've been pretty down the last few weeks but still, thank you for channelling all that love to me, and though i've never ever thought i'd say this- i would vote for you if you Idol- auditioned, cross my heart and hope to die, serious. love, dearest lover dear (:

for RY2:
oh my its been so long since we've last talked isnt it, though i cant thank you enough for listening to me grump/mope before cca started, it helped loads: )yes i'll remember our bet, its definitely on alright, but hey i'm wishing it'll just turn out to be an exchange of money aha, cause i have full faith in your (wisdom), really. you've seen me through 1.5 years of SN life, let's make the last 0.5 worthwhile okay(: i'm not too sure if you're going to stop by ever again but hey, i'll write you, promise, next cca i'll pass you something i've owed for a long, long time <3 you're awesome, no matter what happens, know that and believe it alright :)

for Jess:
term1 was fabulous sharing tables with you, trust me ;D i think you've extended my gossip radar by a mile, though, tsk : O aye thank you for putting up with all my pmsey sessions throughout the term and for allowing me to wallow in misery for a bit that day in silence, its great to have you as a partner, this term's awesome with you (though i think our height difference's still much too obvious, aha), you're appreciated so much i'll write another pickup line for you, one day :)

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
and in this whirlwind we'll stand, we'll stand.

dead man's hand

2009-03-13T20:37:00.002+08:00

i will henceforth avoid all friday the thirteenths like the Great Plague.

its funny how the world can go on and function just as well without you really being a part of it. when your little capsule in corner 48 of the world has shattered, rendering you exposed and vulnerable; the general picture still moves, like you've never meant anything to anyone, before.

its times like this when i feel like lashing out against (no not the world, not people around me, but) myself, hurling verbal abuse like torrential rain drowning a battered soul-- what's the use of trying when you'd just about ruined everything so magnificently in the end/take it hard, break me down.
*and so the angsty ranting continues.
or i could (much later, when the world rests), allow the silent night to swallow me up, ingesting my heartbreak in its entirety, with faintly glowing stars reaching out across obsidian skies to illuminate the streak rippling down my cheek.

when my soul does give- way, with my last breath i'll gasp out my location to a random you, anyone oh just anyone who cares. just so that when you get here and see shards of sanity surrounding a tear- glistened shell of a girl, you'll be able to give me a proper burial, aye.

[remember a rose alright, i've always wanted one : )]

At this moment there are 6470818671 people in the world. Some are running scared, some are coming home. Some tell lies to make it through the day, others are just now facing the truth. Some are evil men at war with good, and some are good struggling with evil.
6 billion people in the world, 6 billion souls and sometimes all you need is 1. just ONE.

hey world, you're 25 minutes too late, cause:
I got my epitaph written 'ready.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
a pair of aces, a pair of eights: look, my man's hand is dead.

maybe this was how icarus felt

2009-03-04T19:21:00.002+08:00

today i sat down (on my chair)
and hugged
myself
simply, a tight squeeze of shoulders

the sensation
fleets, sylph- like across the skin
too delicate and nuanced for
the heart to sense

today i lay down (on my bed)
and wrapped
a cloud
around my mind, sealing
out the world

images of glittering satin
across a velvet dusk- i could not see
for beneath
heavy lids, darkness was
full
and thunder
condensed into warm rain
on sallow cheeks

today i spoke true (to my soul)
and concluded that:

sanity's sentinel is away
(has ran away)
leaving logic to shatter
like a spider lily blossoming
on paper- thin
judgement

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
we are, in the end, all marionettes dancing to the rhythm of conformity's whiplash

wash away, my sanity.

2009-02-26T21:39:00.001+08:00

today (afternoon, mind you) was so swelteringly hot i nearly evaporated in class! and in a burst of inspiration, quipped to R: "i wish it'll rain when school ends"

aye. so much for thinking that the rain gods have bad hearing capabilities:
it didnt rain.
it poured tons, along with buckets of thunder and branches of lighting here- there- everywhere. and as luck would have it, my umbrella was safely dry and nestled IN MY ROOM : O thank goodness R could shelter me till amk central (: where she had to rush off for her dental app and hence leaving me stranded under a musty bus stop, helpless and alone, gazing forlornly at the pounding rain.

alright enough about the damsel in distress scenario, already}

in between deciding whether to brazenly walk up to any random passerby and ask to share his/ her umbrella or to use my file and shield 10% of myself till i cross the road, the rain TRIPLED. i eyed the mini tsunamis swarming around the curb and hurriedly made up my mind to choose the former.

my heroine came in the form of a mgs girl who didnt run away in fear/give me a snotty look/ use her books to whack me silly (like what i'd thought cranky people will do when someone random approaches them). we talked under the umbrella for a bit, both of us huddling under that limited plastic sky and pms-ing about the weather & soaked shoes. we were quite a sight, really, she with half her blouse/skirt soaked through and me with my completely drenched pinafore (plus a right sleeve), delicately avoiding a puddle only to splash foot first into another one.

we talked for a while till my bus came, and from my window seat, i waved my thanks.
i thought about this encounter the whole way home, and came to an odd realization of sorts: we never did ask for each others' names.

i know it wouldnt have mattered after today, who she was, but there was this silent twinge of regret in me, 'cause hereafter i'll only be able to remember her as- 'a mgs girl who helped me one rainy day'.
} funny how little things in life can cheer you up so much; for though in the end my shoes squelched out two pacific oceans on the bus- floor and half my papers were wrinkly and damp, i was happy.

p/s, just to rain on rain's parade:
do note the amount specified in request next time, aye.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
racing raindrops on the car window, with lolly in a hand and my cherry headband

who knew 39 so different would turn out to be something special?

2009-02-13T22:05:00.004+08:00

i penned half of this on a post-it one fine bio lesson, not long after motivationals; then decided to use it for the 100th post *cause something special needs a special number, no?

}
i remember the day out story began (albeit unusually vividly); jan3/2008, where 39 of us were mashed together in this baby green class on the second floor.

Class: 3Grace
for a full year we all traced the elegant curvature of a G under the class section of SN testpads, each in our own distinctive hand, be it B's flowing ones, SF's balloon-like words or even J's narrow formations. we were young, fifteen and full of aspirations, stuck in-between the blissful innocence of lower sec and the impending harshness of sec 4.

now fast forward one year ahead and hit that pause button, ladies.
its still the same class, with the talkative crazies and bridge fans, but with a different number in front. funny how one number encompasses all that 672934 piles of work to be done by nov 09, ay. it cannot be denied that the weeks are trying, the stress nerve- fraying *as seen from the number of heads glued to the table in between periods; but hey:

sometimes what makes it bearable is the simple, pure, undulated fact that all of
us are doing it---together.

now with full credit to the auras of cupidity and saint-valentineism floating around today, can i dedicate/ [a parady of an extract from DavidCook's "always be my baby"]

you'll always be a part of me
somewhere between my aorta and artery
thank god you dont clog my coronary
ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
half a foot in cupidity and a whole arm dunked in saintvalentine-isms

let me tell you the story of a lil' girl, ay.

2009-01-25T20:53:00.004+08:00

i was sorting out my wardrobe one lazy rainy autumn afternoon when i stumbled upon this faded pink wooden box, tucked behind my american eagle turtlenecks and wet seal tees. i fingered the rusty tin edges, picked it up (albeit with much apprehension), sat down on the edge of my quiltcovers and opened-

the lid.
out tumbled striped grosgrain ribbons, the ones mom used to tie my french braids with in kindergarten; a few sheets of doodles on yellowed notebook paper; the friendship braids ardelle and i used to make from violets & summer grass behind the classroom; and a handful of buttons- pinkbluebrownlemon shaped oddities i used to collect as a young young girl. staring at the painfully few childhood items that managed to survive the passing of time, i felt (within my subconscious) a stirring of something long forgotten, something waiting to be heard again.

the rain falls, harder. and in between the pattering of rain's feet on my window and the musical showcase of cicadas at the rosebeds outside, i heard fifteen years of my voices float around the room, all speaking in one rhythm, one beat, synchronized.

i left the box beside kent's valentine bouquet on the window-sill, walked to my cupboard and gently pushed away the dusty barbies on the top shelf. scanning the rows and rows of peeling spines, i finally spotted the one i was looking for- this baby blue notebook, spiral bound with the words "Diane's Diary" squiggly emblazoned in front in purple sparkly ink. the diary is heavy with unspoken secrets, loving promises and wistful dreams, and its pages felt so delicate beneath my sixteen-year-old fingertips as i flipped past 4 years of blue skies ballet classes friendship parties and scrawly handwritings. *for i used to keep a D when i was 5-9, see.

i changed into my rattiest simpsons shirt, dug out a pair of frayed shorts and climbed into bed with D and a traditional pencil. i'll be a kid again for today, i vowed, ever so silently to the precious memories night-light i got as my 8th birthday present, standing solo atop my bedside table.

so while the brown leaves of the apple tree in the backyard float down to earth alongside the rain, i turned to the page 80 (unused) of my diary and penned down the first sentence after 7years since it was last used-
"its funny how quick we grow up, isnt it."

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
and beneath the parisian twilight, i'll capture your smile with my eyes

grandpa's girl.

2009-01-20T19:49:00.007+08:00

its times like this when i wish for a heavy downpour, just so that i have a valid reason to curl up under my blanket and hide. you know how they always say that disappointment hardens your emotions?i suppose it can be concluded that the only reason i feel like an ancient ruin ready to crumble any moment now is because i've been happy for too long. until i've forgotten how disappointment tastes like, feels like. and when it hits me again, i lose my footing, just as easily as how a dandelion rides on the wind's back. i have to search, again and again in this fog of uncertainty for my bearings. love flits by, from time to time, but instead of lending my soul the reassurance it needs, its winking shadows across my skin only serves as a reminder of how foolish i was to think that everything could be a fairytale if i believed it to be.

to be happy, its never too late to subsitute the words "if only" with the words "next time", darling. so dry those tears hey, i'll bring you to the edge of the meadow where we used to chase shadows, and then- we'll count stars together under january's sky with the midnight sigh rippling our love.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.

electric eyeshadow and plastic smile, no you're not my worthwhile;

so here's ride number sixteen for you, a wild one, lady.

2009-01-15T18:27:00.002+08:00

twenty-oh nine,
and i'm turning sixteen. (in 7 months, that is!) and with the title of sec4 comes a whole truckload of assignments/tests/mocks & most unforgettably, stress.

yep. the one emotion that never fails to make you lose your sanity drowning in binomials or homeostasis or electrolysis whatnots, the one feeling that comes packaged with a device for hair- pulling + nail biting and a free headache, all in a box with a pretty bow and a card telling you your expected L1r5, that'll be 6 points lady thank you and good bye.

but hey, who says i'm not going to stand up and fight through, aye?
> oh no no, i'm not going down without a hard fight, *however diminutive my brain may be.
do cross your fingers (and toes and eyes) for me from time to time though, y' never know when i'm going to need THAT stretcher. :)

y know ever since i was a little tot i could spend days and days fantasising about my sweet 16th year where i would finally "grow up", as my 5 year old self used to put it. for 16, no matter in books or movies, is the ultimate glam- it's a major milestone in every girl's life. i had visions of a sixteen chockfull of friends, outings, laughs loves and crazy fun.
} like what i told R today:
" i cant wait for sec4 to be over, but i never want sixteen to end."]

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
and in the end its not the years in your life that counts, its the life in your years.

so speak for me, love.

2009-01-09T09:19:00.004+08:00

i need you like a parasite needs a host, i need you like how i'll miss 'us' the most.

so tell me young man that you` remember- all our secret glances stolen kisses seductive quirks/

Stand around try to make every moment//And be somebody yeah anybody//It seems the whole world is taking me over//I need somebody to help me get back to you

so chapter 82 of my book ends, right here: 9january2009 in a light-bathed classroom somewhere in beijing. and now let me quote something from my post regarding icyl, i shall use this as my opening again, just because it fits, perfectly.

"oh, we do.

we all have places to go, after we've parted- some of us will go on and achieve great feats, powdered faces speaking out to the people from wide- screen plasmas, while the rest soar on amongst the magnolia-dotted skies seeking for that special niche in the world; where you, and only you, can fit into."

for forty-something days we walked the school and dorm corridors like home, we paced the streets of beijing, comfortable in our own laughter, smiles rivalling the sunshine. i bet you ( a bing tang hu lu) that if you stroll down the corridor now, you will still be able to hear our voices dancing to the tune of all our memories, pitch perfect and gracefully synchronized.

its the little things that matter most in the end. for now my mind is not filled with where we went nor what i did during this exceptional journey, but of the way it felt so comfortable talking to people [:-)] i've just met on this trip, of shopping with angmoh accents, of getting pissed off at stewpeed stubborn shopkeepers that dont let you haggle any lower, of camwhoring in the laundry room toilet, of truth or dare, of night- talks in the corridor, of meditation sessions, of scandalous pictures and unglam moments, of crazy B acts, of icecream sharing, of food pigging.

and much, much more.

i had my tears, my smiles, my fears, my laughs.

i especially remember that`
the very first day of bsc was when i lugged my fatso of a luggage into the dorm building and stood around waiting for 20 minutes as everyone tried to squeeze up the lift to the eleventh floor. i was standing in the midst of the flurry when i caught z's eye. i raised my eyebrow. she smiled back, tentative. and in that 3-second exchange, i could see my sentiments in her eyes- this trip's going to be mind- blowing, dear.

now this very last day, where there all that lingers is just unspoken goodbyes. we're all in denial, arent we. no one's going to mention that we're leaving in 14hours 'cause no one wants to admit that bsc's ending, hey/.

maybe i'm going to look through my pictures (again) later.
>and amidst the camera clicks frozen on my screen, i may once again remember, why its so hard to say

goodbye.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
when we've parted we walk away clutching these 40+ days to our hearts, wistful. let us have no regrets: may we stay like this together, forever.

thou shalt not cry on grad day.

2009-01-07T19:59:00.002+08:00

yknow how everywhere i turn, i heard people murmuring about how they dont want to go home, how they never want bsc to end, how they want it to stay like this forever.

its painful, isnt it.

to put seventy plus people together for five weeks and then brutally end their flourishing stories with a plane ride home, back home.
to put twenty eight people together in the same class and then force shut their photo albums just as they were adding more smiles into the pockets.

and so now im sitting in class, alone with the twentyfivemillion emotions pounding their presence in my heart. i have so much to say, (oh yes i do), but really, words are not enough.

i hereby vow that i will not cry on grad day/ farewell.
but hey, this vow's definitely waiting to be broken.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
i need you to say it (out loud) before i can speak my heart, hey. :-)

lady of the night.

2009-01-05T17:14:00.003+08:00

step out onto the ballroom floor
dim the lights and close the door
put your masks on and quirk a smile
hear our shoes click on marble tiles
gloved hands encircling lil' lace waists
true love might just be a touch away

change partners]
twelve midnight and we're not done
we waltz and twirl and dance as one
every other second spent among your eyes
i feel the world losing its light
lady, the spotlight's on us tonight
hold me and let our hearts take flight.

and at one corner of the room]
i'll dance, i'll dance
to the music of my shattering heart
till it doesnt hurt
as their love tears me apart.

>t'is the best image i can paint of my life right now, without sanity as my brush.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
i'd rather be torn apart this way if it doesnt hurt anyone.

got your back, girl.

2008-12-31T13:15:00.002+08:00

mini sports day!

played captball with z,zw,t,j and sc against the anglic and nanhua girls. though we lost in the end it was a great game really! I havent played a proper game of Cball for so long, it felt great to monkey-block people and intercept the tallies' passes HA ;D SN victorettes all the way xx

>HCI victors were absolutely awesome, and the way they played were marvellously magnificent, i exaggerate not. we cheered like banshees at the sidelines all the while ahaha

we're counting up 2009 this midnight. hopefully there wont be people who get all indignant at our presence in the corridor and bellow at us to return to our rooms right away again today. *yeap y'all know who's zat! -cheeky grins.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique!
you're the reason i keeping adding scenes into my Life's play.

i got that right back in my face, young man.

2008-12-29T19:22:00.005+08:00

it's a rollercoaster day, 'gain.

have you ever felt like sometimes the world's just this tiny box that life keeps injecting dramas into, and whenever things blow out of proportion you'll just be squashed against one side of the wall, breathlessly overwhelmed?

for fifteen years i have always been the one standing at the sidelines cheering for someone else's happiness while sending my heart on one- way flights to remote places of the world, only to find that they've all crashed and burnt in my own backyard.

-so thank you for being here, both of you.
y'both are the only two that knows every line/ scene/cue from my play.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
there cant be another disaster this week, my schedule's already full!

to waltz with you on the street when its snowing--

2008-12-26T17:48:00.002+08:00

24dec]
the bsc xmas party was fabulously zinging! although there were some people sitting in corners and sulking during games/pmsing during the whole party period and dampening the mood, ROAR. yz,yc,c,s,js and i kinda crapped out the whole thing within 5 discussions; but i guess the overall result was still santa-lovely :-)
--gift exchange at night was ze- love, xx.

25dec]
we spent christmas sitting in a cramped meeting room and stoning/dozing off for 3 hours +. Keppel land's the first place to bust my dull-o-meter, dudes. *merry christmas, indeed.

26dec]
i'll have a boxy boxing day all packaged up in a pretty box with frilly bows and a kiss, thank you sir.
immersion today was quite alright, ahaha km and i crapped away all the lessons except pe, where the girls made me play volleyball with them ;D and told me who crushes who in class!
>had wushu today, with some teacher that looks and talks and behaves and irritates like hitler reincarnated! i was giving him death glares and eye-rolls throughout the lesson, roar. >:/ and he made us run five rounds around the track in the cold!

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
they'll tear us apart if we stay put any longer.

the ferris-wheel

2008-12-19T19:24:00.002+08:00

behind a dusty pane
i survey the mirage of lights
below
where carousels and rollercoasters
vied for attention.
fingers gliding through dust
i etched out
memories on the window
paying tribute
to the grounds that once housed
my childhood
my laughter.

time stilled, leaving me
swinging,suspended in sweet air, where
rusted seats creak their protests
and by
dancing behind spring's footsteps
my nose is filled
with lingerings of
grass, lilies, daffodils.

then i could
see
the dampness of earth
buoyant, swirling
up towards
patches of magnolia
or perhaps:
destined to settle in a place
that even from the top of the wheel
i can only
guess from a distance.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
if there's nothing missing in my life, then why do these tears come at night?

for one more day. xx, forev and always.

2008-12-17T19:09:00.002+08:00

when the clock hits four i exhale, slowly.
and amidst the climax of seventy-plus primary ones barreling towards the door, i feel myself tearing. *ah yes i know there will be people saying- come on wenyi you're too emotional-again?

but only four of us were in the P1 classroom today.
and only we saw, the way they snatched at the crayons and lollipops like there wont be any tomorrow.

i feel no spontaneous urge to cheer, it's hard to describe the way i feel as i weave my way across the cramped classroom. the room's emptying, yet i can still hear their voices, syllables overlapping each other like vines entwined. my friends are coming in, they're chalking each other on the faces, and i stand in the middle of the class-- i capture the moment with my eyes, saving eighty minutes worth of experience into my mind, because:

when right now becomes the past, i still want to remember.}
oh, i do, i do.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
'cause baby dont you see, my heart's pieced together with my sanity.

kiss the flecks, baby

2008-12-10T07:47:00.003+08:00

it snowed in the morning!

the flecks were rather tiny, though, like dandruff/ light fur. OKAY i know its poor imagery but really, its the closest thing i can think of that bears a resemblance to the baby snow. or you can save your breakfast in your stomach and try imagining talcum powder instead, hey.

tianjin on monday and great wall on tues were the loveliest days so far!

T} the ten of us sat together for lunch and dinner, ate super little and basically lazed around feeling bloated the whole time. then when it was time to return to the coach, we suddenly decided to get drunk and start singing weird songs from different parts of the century. (oldies included) souvenir shopping was cool, we got some great bargains ahaha xx!

GW} i officially declare that i have a phobia of stairs after climbing the mty gw. ROAR.
nothing can beat bargain-shopping after that though! sc came up with this brilliant idea to speak in english with accents so that the shopkeepers will be falling all over themselves to suck up to us and give us really low prices. so in the end, z was our translator; while b, sc and i were north americans "from the other side of the world" visiting beijing for the first time.

AND
we got everything at much lower prices than the rest! *dances around the room in glee

-today was crabby.
i had this really, really smart idea of asking z to cheer-flip me on the school track 'cause i was feeling boppy. then 'cause our winter jackets were so slippery, i slid right out under her arms and FELL, HARD on the right side of my body on the track!
now i have a bloody scrape on my knee. (&
yippeeyoodles :/

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
love y'smile.

whoop-dee-doop!

2008-12-05T19:07:00.003+08:00

first friday of the first week]

forbidden palace, completed with ice-cold winds frosty hands/toes and plenty of agonizing whimpers all in one package with your winter coat, here you go that'll be 80 renminbi mister thank you and have a (n)ice day. zw z and i were totting around, shivering like madpies, trying to snap shots with stiff fingers. finally we couldnt stand it anymore and decide to hole up in every souvenir shop we came across on the way out. There was this final bookshop (yes, a bookshop) near the exit that looked warm and inviting, so we hustled in like shameless aunties looking for bargains in a bazaar.

Ha.
Turns out they have 2 standing heaters blasting 30`Cels air around the shop! *jumps up and down in delight. we kept going out and returning again 'cause the air was really too cold! the shopkeepers must've either thought that "eh, these xiaomeis are so bookthirsty. OR "wo de tian! they want free heater is it the little shameless hussies!

still, couldnt care less.
I'd rather look like a shameless auntie in the eyes of some balding shopkeeper than to die in a place where icicles will freeze on my skin and turn my lips blue/ purple. I prefer dying with pink lips and normal skin, thank you very much. ROAR<

p/s: i swear my retainers shrunk from the cold!

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
i want to be more than something you just glance past when you're looking at her out of the corner of your eye.

epilogue: no one wou;d've guess how inadequate i feel. this is making me question the very foundation of myself- me.

swept away, ah yes.

2008-12-04T19:10:00.003+08:00

trudged around beijing zoo when the temperature was at negative 2`Cels! I guess i froze my fingers but managed to warm them by holding them above the zoo- toilet's radiator. roar.

Well after lunch we stumbled upon this hidden gem of a distribution centre, where there were 4 floors and at least 200 little squashed-up stores in it. *prances around in glee ;D! I tried to slash the price with this evil looking A-L over a really nice (but fake, i s'pose) varsity hoodie, then she had to give me the evileye and say: (in a really thick chineez ag-zent)- dont you try to play with me, xiao mei, i'm giving you the distribution price!

HELL-O! vhattheH, indeed. Me, being the civilised person i am, even bothered saying thank you before rolling my eyes and stalking off in a huff! *snorts in indignance* you all should be proud of my manners, aye.

we're totting around the city by public transport. ROAR. getting up the car itself is a challenge, i tell you. Unlike sg where people smile and stand aside to let the people inside get out before drifting in, the bj-ers shove their way (in/out) simultaneously like its the end of the world. Mark my worlds, if there's a "the day after tomorrow" situation, these people will be the ultimate survivors. Their elbows are extremely strong.

its negative 7`Cels outside now, i think.
Someone please tell me my nose will NOT drop off and elope with the winter wind!

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
quote of the week:
tracy] (after being squashed up against zw's fur-lined coat in the lift) oh my god.i think i ate FUR. pui!

JUST PLANE DEAD!

2008-11-30T21:09:00.004+08:00

She stands in front of the entire plane
She tries her best to explain
What to do in the event of an emergency
And at the same time assuring us with her voice
This is in-fact,
A safe place to be.

She places a very old lifejacket on...

"In the unlikely event of a landing at sea.."
Surely you cannot attempt a landing without land
Maybe this is what she means by unlikely
Maybe she should say
That there is a strong possibility
That we could plunge from the sky screaming all the way...

"Exits are here, here, here and here,
Two at the front two at the back."
Now I heard when you pee up there in the sky
It's ejection from the plane forms a block of ice
And some unsuspecting passing person below might just die!
If it fell on their head,
Death by urination it is said,
Isn't a pleasant way to end up dead!

So to recap...
In the event of an unlikely event
The following sequence is what should be followed:
Listen to the captain speak loudly over the loud speaker
Place your oxygen mask over your face is the first thing to do
Before helping others that you see turning blue
Wrestle to get your seatbelt on
Pray or scream depending whether your coolness has gone
Maybe confess your unfaithfulness to your partner
Maybe a secret you've kept hidden or maybe you've lived with a lie
Remember to do this only if you're sure you're going to die
And plunge very very very quickly out of the sky
If perhaps your death isn't forthcoming
Perchance the plane's simply skidded
With sparks and flames flying
To a metal screaming halt
Wrestle with your seatbelt to get that off
And vault
Punch and kick your way to the door
Pull anyone in your way to the floor
A matter of life for you, death for anyone in your way
Forget the excuse me or the pardons or the have a nice day
And hope one of those fun looking inflatable bouncy shoots is in place.
Or you may exit the exit and fall on your face.
That you wouldn't want to do
Lying, after all that effort to escape
With your skull cracked in two

Now these istructions should set you in better stead
So you know what you're doing,
And avoid ending up just plane dead.

>Copyright; Gordon Taylor

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
now this guy penned the poem on the back of an airsick bag.
he never got to use it, preferring the lap of the person to his left!

hey hermoine, i need your time- turner.

2008-11-25T15:34:00.004+08:00

oh, we do.

we all have places to go, after we've parted- some of us will go on and achieve great feats, powdered faces speaking out to the people from wide- screen plasmas, while the rest soar on amongst the magnolia-dotted skies seeking for that special niche in the world; where you, and only you, can fit into.

for five days we walked the hallways and corridors like home, potential ideas entwining together like ivy vines on Tudor walls during discussions, where voices of different nations danced together in the aircon breeze, pitch- perfect and gracefully synchronized.

anyone could say that this was just another convention. maybe, i thought, when i was flipping through the program. another leadership conference, completed with plenty of sleepy speeches, facil sessions and outings outings outings. all in one package with your morning coffee, ma 'am, that'll be $7.85 here you go and thank you.

but i was wrong.
and i was, and am still, extremely glad to be proven so. :-)

for these 5 days was a true journey of self- discovery, where i began to see in myself- past ribbons of red and honeycombs of pulsating membrane: where I truly lay, nestled in the 15 years' worth of dreams that i've conjured. for the first time, i truly believed that despite all the obstacles i have and have not face(d), despite my obvious disadvantage in the brain size sector: i can become an advocate for something i believe in/ feel for. that is, if i have the confidence in myself. on the other hand, sharing sessions became a platform for me to learn about others' take on world issues and aided me in achieving a deeper understanding of each individual's character.

oh, and who could forget all the different activities where we screamed and laughed so hard we hardly had any energy left "to breathe", as sue puts it? or all the different camwhore sessions we had? or maybe even opMAD, where everyone of us sat as a group in front of GrandHyatt and shouted g'afternoon to everyone walking past? ;D, indeed.

i especially remember` that
the very first day of icyl was when i tottered up the steps of rg on court'shoes that were imprinting blisters onto my heels, sat down and saw this girl wearing a green blazer standing near the pillar. hi, she said. hi, i said, offering a tentative smile. she smiled. who's this girl, i thought, she's so friendly. then so there she stood and there i sat, both silent, till the next car (a mercedes, if i'm not wrong) drives up and she walks away to usher her.

and the last, the last day filled with tears illuminated in the candlelights flickering in the hallway; resonating with unspoken farewells and 3- minute hugs-- no. stop. i dont want to remember the last, firsts are always easier to relive than lasts. (don't you think?) so the convention ends in raucous applause and tight embraces and camera clicks.

i pose, and smile.

now there are no walls between any of us, and spaces that exist five days ago were now filled in with unspoken love, endless blessings.

when we're done we walk away clutching these 5 days to our hearts, wistful. let us have no regrets: may we stay like this together, forever.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
forever's too short for us, my love. xx.

inspired by shawn johnson.

2008-11-24T10:40:00.002+08:00

[wrote this a long time ago, in class.
now written from memory, 'cause i've lost the paper, silly me.]

standing in line, its soon my turn
the butterflies soar, they return
girl before who gave her all
yet always seemed to carry a fall
the crowd is ruthless, beady eyes trained
witnessing her glory, devouring her pain
a champion's road is never smooth
if you fall, there's nothing to sooth
and the balance point between landings and falls
is just a moment, no time to stall.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
to cry your heart broken and yet cannot afford a bucket for tears.

ah rowling, i hereby quoteth thee

2008-11-16T12:55:00.004+08:00

fred: voldy can move faster than severus snape confronted with shampoo.

molly: you're a prefect? oh ronnie! that's everyone in the family!
george: what are fred and I? next door neighbours?

ron: percy won't recognise a joke even if it danced naked in front of him wearing dobby's tea cozy

hermoine: but we just had divination, professor, and professor trelawney told us...
McGonagall: oh yes, i understand. which one of you will be dying next year?

umbridge: tell them i mean no harm!
harry: sorry professor, i must not tell lies.

AHA,indeed!

and i just deleted my tagged account (which was created one drowsy afternoon 2 years ago and then had been neglected even more than my CME file). i signed out for the last time, only to be greeted by a "you deleted your account! we're bummed. please tell us why--". i didnt have the heart to click "there's nothing fun for me to do on tagged/ i recieve too many mails/ i dont like the people", so i just shut the whole window down.

i felt really bad, yknow. ): for some odd reason that i myself cant even comprehend, i'm feeling sorry for an internet application.:/

quite odd.
c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, so long as one remembers to turn on the light.

a tissue for you, frou frou.

2008-11-14T21:31:00.002+08:00

i arrived, anyway:
too late for anything except to realise that all along things have always been-
either, or.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
hope set sail on the tumultous waters of Fate, only to run aground on the shores of heartbreak.

yakkity yak!

2008-11-13T22:05:00.002+08:00

havent split my sides laughing in ages.
Till:

NOTICE-- This Department Requires No Physical Fitness Program

Everyone gets enough exercise jumping to conclusions, flying of the handle, running down the boss, knifing friends in the back, dodging responsibility and pushing their luck.

on xinyi's picture of celine on facebook: (comments)
JIAYU:
LOL No way. I came into the world with pure nakedness and the pureness of my soul.NOTHING CAN BEAT PURENESS I TELL YOU!NOTHING ~~~~-floats away in my pureness-
CELINE:
And nothing can beat nakedness too right? : ))I came into this world with a pervy expression and absolutely no hair.
XINYI:
Chanel is for old people who smell like powder! I ALWAYS FELT A PERVY PRESCENE AT THE HOSPITAL. MAYBE IT WAS YOU! LEERING AT THE BABY NEXT TO YOU, AKA ME.

and so the thread continues.
now you try reading it with a straight face!
rollofollo the girl using her laptop next to me must've thought i was going mad!

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
but i am but a composer, and thus i only know how to weave my love for you into strands of music.

the ferris-wheel

2008-11-11T21:35:00.003+08:00

behind a dusty pane
i survey the mirage of lights
below
where carousels and rollercoasters
vied for attention.
fingers gliding through dust
i etched out
memories on the window
paying tribute
to the grounds that once housed
my childhood
my laughter.

time stilled, leaving me
swinging,
suspended in sweet air, where
rusted seats creak their protests
and by
dancing behind spring's footsteps
my nose is filled
with lingerings of
grass, lilies, daffodils.

then i could
see
the dampness of earth
buoyant, swirling
up towards
patches of magnolia
or perhaps:
destined to settle in a place
that even from the top of the wheel
i can only
guess from a distance.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
my photoalbums still have freeze-frames of the times where we believed everything held a fairytale within,(:

for grandpa,

2008-11-03T19:08:00.008+08:00

*i put a comma in the title, 'cos i never want anything with you, about you, to end*

i thought about you the whole bus- ride home, and even when i was walking uphill towards the hostel. that, and a whole lot of things too. it struck me (albeit very painfully) that its been 12 years.

12 years is a long time. as the (365x12) days flit past, many change, many grow; events happen, emotions flow. i think of myself 12 years before, where the last memory of me you had was a frightened face, a panicked voice, punctuated by desperate cries. pleas. for you to stay, to watch me grow up.

accompanying this sliver of memory, other pieces are dredged up-- moments spanning 3 years, captured in polaroids, weaving a story of the past where everything was a fairytale.

i know that night's leave was never truly goodbye
you told me up where the angels lie
you'll guard me (us) throughout my (our) life
till i see you again the day i die.

love,me/>
c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
i'll miss you forever and always, and if i reach the day after forever i'll just hop to square one and start again.

to you, and you. jabs finger into thin air

2008-11-03T18:54:00.003+08:00

dear karma of the universe:
('cos it'll be very bad (and an ultimate sin) to accuse God of my folly),

i appeal to you now to take pity on me. me, an insignificant girl contributing (not much, sadly) to Singapore's land population. i deeply regret my incompetence at preserving the faith others have in me, for squandering their trust and constantly letting them down. do, lease do, trust me when i say that i've never ever meant to commit these atrocious acts (dont worry, i've never killed a soul). i pray, with all my heart, that o respected one would rescue me from the depths of my muddled mind and restore it to sanity, thus granting me the power of thinking CLEARLY once again, before i disappoint someone else.

and, if its not too much to ask, i appeal to you to shower good karma on Ferrari's 2 drivers for their races next year. (i send my deepest sympathies, Massa. i'll try to encourage everyone not to buy nescafe from now on, considering the fact that L.Ham's face is plastered all over their ads!)

Thank you very much. you know i believe in you, oh yes, i do.

& yknow what?
(not my) dear mr bad luck and king of muddled brains:

Fine, you win, alright?!
i lost my mind. bet you're cackling away in glee, you prick, you.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
some people will aim for the top of the curve, but i can only hope for positive coordinates.

pictures tell, but its not the words kind of say.

2008-11-01T16:34:00.003+08:00

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.

its the sound of silence, the kind that doesnt need an ear, but a heart, to feel.

because all the time i was living a lie.

2008-10-30T23:37:00.003+08:00

曾经幻想历经苦痛的灵魂已变得坚强，
直到自信的逃跑揭开这个心碎的真相：
明白了原来一切不过是骗局--
我伤痕累累的躯壳再次倒地。

I got tired of waiting
wondering if you were ever coming around
my faith in you was fading
when i met you on the outskirts of town, and I said
romeo save me i’ve been feeling so alone
i keep waiting for you but you never come
is this in my head, i don’t know what to think
he knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring and said
marry me juliet you’ll never have to be alone
i love you and thats all I really know
i talked to your dad go pick out a white dress
its a love story baby just say yes

(ho, joy, you got this into my head!;D)

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
i stuck your promise in my diary, along with those lilies of the meadow, still warm(from your embrace).

2008-10-27T01:10:00.002+08:00

prologue:
[the script]
People talk about the guy that's waiting on a girl
There are no holes in his shoes but a big hole in his world
Maybe i'll get famous as the man who can't be moved
Maybe you wont mean to but you'll see me on the news
And you'll come running to the corner
cause you'll know it's just for you
I'm the man who can't be moved.

----->continued/>, by yours truly(:

and there are days i miss you
so much i'll eat chocolate fondue
hoping that in the lights of the cafe window
i'll catch a glimpse of our former shadows
i clutch your goodbye and crane my head
seeing no you but strangers instead
one more time, i vow
if i dont see you i'll go
but yet deep down i know
that vow was never meant to hold.

inspired by the script's: the man who cant be moved.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
its so hard being me, instead of we; y'know.

boy,i killed your image one day.

2008-10-21T20:00:00.007+08:00

sifting through the piles of files in my recycle bin
i spot in between ppt.s and jpg.s
the eiffel tower and you and i
frozen in pixels, frozen in time. and there was this
thin
ribbon of memory, floating into my mind
conjuring up (like the copperfield guy you liked)
the slap-pap-taps
of our feet on the banks of the Seine. but
it was (rather rudely, i must say)
erased away quite swiftly
and as if to emphasized this, my fingers quickly danced
across the keyboard
to a certain "del" key, hovering,
waiting for the final command.
i looked
at the hundreds & thousands of
digital bits
forming your face, your face pressed against mine.
then, out of morbid curiosity (to see how you will tuck yourself out of existence)
my finger tapped.
it took you one millisecond to flounder about
in the sea of verbs and images
before disintegrating, leaving behind
only
a sash of pixellated blood,
spilling
across
my
screen.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
history repeats itself, and i now have a new heart to mend, a new memory to forget.

i dont think distress needs a title,eh.

2008-10-21T19:36:00.007+08:00

its times like this when i wish for a heavy downpour, just so that i have a valid reason to curl up under my blanket and hide. you know how they always say that disappointment hardens your emotions? and if we were to applying *albeit rather morbidly* the saying that "practice makes perfect" to this situation, then it can be concluded that the only reason i feel like an ancient ruin ready to crumble any moment now is because i've been happy for too long. until i've forgotten how disappointment tastes like, feels like. and when it hits me again, i lose my footing, just as easily as how a dandelion rides on the wind's back. i have to search, again and again in this fog of uncertainty for my bearings. love flits by, from time to time, but instead of lending my soul the reassurance it needs, its winking shadows across my skin only serves as a reminder of how unworthy i am to have visits from her, to be at the recieving end of a stick so full of acceptance it hurts to even contemplate the thought that i keep letting people down.
i'm sorry.i really am.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
we were always an illusion, a lie to mask the gaping scars love could not mend.

le' encounter blunder

2008-10-20T22:11:00.002+08:00

started on by me, continued by serene. lovelay, if i must say.((:

wenyi:
hey! oy! watch where you're going!
sorry,sir, i cant see who i'm bumping.
oh sorry, i didnt know you're a blind.
i thought so too, but never mind.
let me help you, old chap, to cross this busy street.
i dont want you to be late for your meet.
at least i wont feel so guilty.
if you dont get going i'll turn grouchy.
oh come on, the green light's flashing!
hey man, what are you doing?
sacrificing yourself as your guiding tool.
but my destination's at the opposite, fool!

serene:
oops i'm sorry i didnt know, you really didnt have to be so cold
though i'm blind i dont need help
but you're so lost like you're entangled in kelp
you silly person watch the nonsense you spout
then the man walked away in a pout

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
in this nonsensical ball of nonsense i found sanity hanging by a thread

2008-10-18T21:12:00.001+08:00

"you never hear about a sportsman losing his sense of smell in a tragic accident, and for good reason; in order for the universe to teach excruciating lessons that we are unable to apply in later life, the sportsman must lose his legs, the philosopher his mind, the painter his eyes, the musician his ears, the chef his tongue. "

"i was too young to die of old age but too old for infant mortality. i was stuck in the middle, that terrible stretch of time where people cant help but breathe."

i think steven T is a genius with words. how can anyone string such ordinary english words together to make a necklace of beautiful phrases, i'll never know.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
my world isnt falling apart imperceptiby anymore. these days it makes a loud RRRIP.

2008-10-14T22:16:00.002+08:00

(:, but still.
somehow the waters are always at their calm(est) before a storm. and according to that theory, then, happiness always comes before heartbreak.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
some man invented disappointment, but he forgot to patent it; and now there are a whole load of copycats in the world/,.

2008-10-10T19:06:00.003+08:00

today is get roasted alive under the sun day! (i am already sporting tan lines across my ankles, ugh)

did anyone realise sec123 Grace had red class tees?! but of course, ours were the hottest hahaha.
conspicuous enough to warrant easy identifications!

FRISBEE BABY! i never knew one could trade so much laughs over a neon plastic disk(:

now, as i think of it,i realise something much more significant. the frisbee represents our friendship; the field symbolizes life. everytime one drops the frisbee, there will definitely be another who rushes to pick it up, no? it's a subtle representation of life, and this made me realise- even if your heart is broken, be it by love, friendship or trust, there are people who still care. like the people who rush to pick up a fallen frisbee, there will too be a kind soul who will not hesitate to guide a grieving you towards hope again. a frisbee falls, many times, throughout the course of the game; yet almost immediately, it flies towards the clouds again, aided by a helping hand.and thus,i suppose it is vital for us to channel our beliefs into those who slip and fall during the journey to success; for behind every successful person, there is a friend.

threegrace08frisbeebabes, love. you all've redefined the word "fun" in my dictionary.
had a great day! :D given a choice, i'll gladly brave the blazing sun again.

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
follow the wind's dance, girl. i'll be waiting for you at the edge of ethopia.

2008-10-09T18:09:00.002+08:00

i think my new skin's font is puny!
goodness. if i'm 78 and still a hip websurfer i would make sure this skin is changed by then.

DENISE NEO! (here's the egobooster post i promised. )
the abovementioned is one of the greatest beings ever to set foot on planet Earth. Earth is very much priviledged to contribute whatever unpolluted air to her alveoli, ensuring her smooth growth. Germany is also extremely proud of her, and the colors of her national flag were inspired by her: black, for her raven hair; red, for her cherry lips; yellow, for, um, the way the sun brightens up whenever she's around. and she is much loved by loads of people, no matter what she thinks. *especially by me! : D* it is written in the stars that she will succeed, success is in her destiny, and no one can change destiny. (:

see! :D are you feeling much better now? :D

c'est le ton qui fait la musique.
i bumped into euphoria at a carnival one day, and lost my ticket for the ride of sanity.

2008-10-07T21:52:00.007+08:00

thought my sec3 phase wouldnt be complete without a post commemorating the end of E-O-Ys.

WHOOSH!
well i gave it my all. really and truly. so i guess even if the outcome isnt what i'll hope it'll be (considering my obvious lack in the brainsize area), i wont have any regrets. this is one of the few times i've pushed myself so hard, silencing every ribbon of doubt in the recesses of my mind and holding on to whatever little faith i had in myself like how a drowning man holds on to a life preserver.

the next few hours after the paper was just wonderful. yes, we went mad we were crapping we took the mrt twentyfivemillion times we took stupid pictures *ellie caryl yuhui wouldnt hoho>( * we watched the extremelyfantabulouslovelyCOOL Eagle Eye..
& i was happy.
really and truly.
it was the most marvellous feeling ever, that undescribable, euphoric emotion bubbling inside of me, washing away my worries for the day, steadying the throbbing of my much fried brain.
it was all i could ask for.

thank you, carylelliejolenejoyrachelyuhuiyuqi (: *notice all your names are in alphab order! *grins 8)

je t'aime,ac.ies perfecto.
if we were to meet in court someday, my lawyer would only have one statement to say- who gave you the right to steal my heart away?

2008-10-06T17:03:00.003+08:00

CHAPTER1}
and i'll sit still on a cloudy Monday evening, looking at the streets below the window and wondering what may have been. as the evening makes way for the night, i finally decide-- it's time, time to leave myself behind and journey to a place where i am just a face in the crowd, unnoticed.
CHAPTER2}
the spotlight dims, the theatre empties.
as for the girl on stage?
she's clutching a picture hey that was taken ages ago when she was still a baby, mourning for the passing of her soul.
for she was merely an empty shell, a cracked shell etched with Pain's portraits.
do you see it? her shell's held together by pieces of her sanity.

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.
am i?

2008-09-27T21:38:00.003+08:00

whoosh, the wind calls,
laughter bending the mayflower stalks.
the children race around
in circles, on the merry go round
spin swirl
turn twirl
memories fading by like a blur
the girl flying on the swing was not to be
in her place lay a broken bee's sting
and if you look carefully
you'll see
this piece of her heart
speared by the sting
bleeding
on
the
swing

epilogue.
hey girl , do you remember?the swing whispered. you left your childhood here.
yes, i replied.but i am growing up.and this new world i'm facing requires me to leave my innocence behind.

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.
i'm lost. and i'm gone. ceased to exist. just. like. that.

eh, i thought it was, but we never were.

2008-09-19T11:14:00.002+08:00

when circumstances force you to grieve,
how strong is your belief?

the carousel stops,
the girl falls,
darkness descends,
her belief stalls.

tears cascade, Life's curtain falls.

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.
the things we do, the masks we try on, just to avoid the dissection of our soul.

phishdish.

2008-09-06T23:40:00.003+08:00

this is for all who do not agree with me on the subject of cedric diggory *the great big wink*

ahh.

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.

2008-09-06T00:35:00.002+08:00

am disappearing off the blogosphere, till exams are ovah!

for once, i cant find a reason to lame- laugh. :/

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.
& i fool myself into thinking that this time, when i shoot,
i'll hit the moon.

2008-08-11T09:37:00.002+08:00

Hailie I know you miss your mom
and I know you miss your dad
Well I'm gone but I'm trying to give you the life that I never had
I can see you're sad, even when you smile, even when you laugh
I can see it in your eyes, deep inside you want to cry
Cause you're scared, I ain't there?
Daddy's with you in your prayers
No more crying, wipe them tears
Daddy's here, no more nightmares
We gon' pull together through it, we gon' do it
Laney uncles crazy, ain't he?
Yeah but he loves you girl and you better know it
We're all we got in this world
When it spins, when it swirls
When it whirls, when it twirlsTwo little beautiful girls
Lookin' puzzled, in a daze
I know it's confusing you
Daddy's always on the move, mamma's always on the news
I try to keep you sheltered from it but somehow it seems
The harder that I try to do that, the more it backfires on me
All the things growing up his daddy that he had to see
Daddy don't want you to see but you see just as much as he did
We did not plan it to be this way, your mother and me
But things have gotten so bad between us
I don't see us ever being together ever again
Like we used to be when we was teenagers
But then of course everything always happens for a reason
I guess it was never meant to be
But it's just something we have no control over and that's what destiny is
But no more worries, rest your head and go to sleep
Maybe one day we'll wake up and this will all just be a dream

hey girl, the one in my heart,
let me tell you, ay
i just discovered that i
could crumble
away
just as easily
as the flecks of dust
on an ancient wall
now bring me back, to the past
the present hurts too much
to bear.

i once knew an angel named
hope
she traveled like a ghost into shadows
her heart was dying for some form of life
all was traumatised
now
the angel burns to
die.

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto
was i so blind, so foolish, too high?

2008-08-10T00:26:00.002+08:00

Hey! what's the big idea?
Yo Mika!
I said, sucking too hard on your lollipop, or love's gonna get you down,
I said, sucking too hard on your lollipop, or love's gonna get you down.

Sucking too hard on your lollipop, or love's gonna get you down,
sucking too hard on your lollipop, or love's gonna get you down.
Say love, say love,or love's gonna get you down.
say love, say love,or love's gonna get you down.

it never fails to cheer me up(;

i think this must be the happiest birthday week ever!
i was laughing so hard every day, every period, in school. then thursday was awesome! (((((: with lots of laughs, *make that loads* and a lot of lame-ness flying back and forth among the 2 tables. whoosh, dears.

then coming home was wonderful too:D
so in short, a big thank you and many many hugs to everyone who have, in their own way, made my FANTASTIC FIFTEENTH the smiley-est birthday ever. (((:

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.
you know i still care, i do, i do.

2008-08-08T22:33:00.002+08:00

lli finally came to the conclusion that i am extremely nice. really, sometimes i amaze myself so much.

*i am NOT TRYING TO SCANDALISE WITH THE PERSON WHOSE NAME WILL BE MENTIONED BELOW*

apparently leeyongmei wants to blog about her. i dont know why i agreed. i must be going mad!

or maybe its just my wonderful, kind heart working its powers. (must be, indeed.)

so here goes:

i am currently blogging about lee yong mei from 4g/ sngs 2008. she has 2 husbands(or wives?)-- wanying & brenda wong. she has never been late at the carpark 26 gate (i know, cos i did duty there) she loves cows. and she believed that i had an ANIMAL FARM in malaysia. (that was really toot._____. hahah)she is in the defensor wing of the sngs student council. as of 15minutes ago (pardon my lousy horrible internet connection), she was watching the opening ceremony of the beijing summer olympics, and there was this caucasian guy that caught her eye. (ohoh wanying beware!)

see i kept to my promise okay!!! :D
AYE.
im high im high! whoohoo olympics! (((((:

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.
i am a wonderful girl with a golden heart. *nods*

08 summer olympics

2008-08-08T20:32:00.002+08:00

BOOM.

and with much fireworks, music, and jaw- dropping performances, the 08 summer olympics begins.

go go athletes! (:

yknow, this must be the most memorable pre- birthday night ever. When i'm 80 with greying hair and wrinkled hands, i can still proudly tell my grandtots-- grandma spent her pre- 15th birthday night watching the opening ceremony of the beijing olympics LIVE! *thank god for color tv and satellites* Hah! bet they cant top that.

(uh, obviously. because by then, the beijing olympics would have been LONG OVER. HAHAH)

:D whoohoo!!

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.

the dragon rears its head, and steps up onto the international stage

2008-06-28T21:02:00.003+08:00

THIS POST SHALL NOT BE YEEMOW. *emo.

a lot of people have been saying that! 0.0 i'm not emo, i'm just dark, deep & reflective. (this makes me sound like a mirror)

Open house today was quite fun, besides the fact that my legs went paralysed from the lack of circulation and one point of time! Witnessed the dissection process of an eyeball, a heart, and a frog in the morning. Poor frog. The tiny heart was still beating away long after its insides were displayed openly to the public in their full glory! the project displays went ignored most of the time, since the visitors were riveted to the gory dissecteds' displays.

AAYE.

next week, i'll be seating with a new partner! that means no more gambling/poking or laming, not even cheekopek discussions! )): gah. well at least you influenced me EXTREMELY WUNDERBARLY much! :D:D i think my math likes you better than me. :/

here's your CANDID picture! *dont scream yet. * *evil grins* it shows your nice legs!!!

to she-who-resisted-the-call-of-the-french-fry, thanks heaps for helping me much during the term! ((((: oh, and before i forget,

1. i still owe you a rotten tomato

2. i have not poked your bellybutton yet

3. i owe you betting money, which i WILL dutifully return. i'm honest.

ohno. this post is making me lame & toot. i'm high now. :D

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.

next week, i'll be sitting with brudder belinda, hahas(:

2008-06-18T23:33:00.002+08:00

Term 3 is going to be mind- bopping, nerve- wracking, hair- pulling, madly, CRAZY.
But i shall make it fun! *somehow.

Term 2 was smashingly spectacularly magnificento!
Term 3 shall be even better.
Let's hope i'll last through the term in one piece, shall we? (:

adios.
till next time again, it'll be soon.

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.
whoosh. back to my doodled desk, with a trusty facial spray!

2008-06-05T00:10:00.002+08:00

a day in the december of 2006, Phuket beach

walking along the paved path
that leads to the sea
i watch amber rays play hide and seek with the palm leaves
and feel the wind's breath
tickling my hair, while
the sand particles rise, mingling
with the dust, suspended
in the air like a gold mist
still hovering, even after i cross the path
onto the beach
the pricking of sand on my toes
mingled with an occasional sandfly bite(or two)
(i remember you thought they were a nuisance)
and reached the small black rock, standing solo
at the entrance of the cove
bending down, i can almost picture you here again
(you looked so real in you white sundress
yet my fingertips grazed only air)
with me, etching into the rock with a swiss army knife
our initials, forever sealed with
cupid's heart; and
i kiss your initials softly, tasting the saltiness of the sea...

or was it my tears?

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.
it was supposed to be our last waltz amongst the sand- dunes that day.
it was supposed to be your happy birthday.

2008-06-03T23:17:00.006+08:00

" LAUGHTER MAKES THE WORLD GO ROUND ", as quoted from my dear seating partner, pictured above with a sexy bedhead. *grins*

so i hereby dedicate this post to be a cheery chirpy smiley bopping sunshine one, full of jokes. it really isn't easy finding those that are really funny! the writer, for one, has a strong aversion towards KnockKnock jokes. she just doesnt see the point in any of them. (:

1. On the wall in a ladies' room:

"my husband follows me everywhere."

written below it:

"i do not!"

2. One day, a robber barged into a bank, demanding for money. He said to the manager, "give

me all you have or you're geography! "

Manager: "you mean, history."

Robber: "dont change the subject."

3. TEACHER: Why are you late?

WEBSTER: Because of the sign.

TEACHER: What sign?

WEBSTER: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."

TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water?

SARAH: H I J K L M N O!!

TEACHER: What are you talking about?

SARAH: Yesterday you said it's H to O!

*imagine what mr teoh would say!

TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America.

GEORGE: Here it is!

TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?

CLASS: George!

TEACHER: Ellen, give me a sentence starting with "I."

ELLEN: I is...

TEACHER: No, Ellen..... Always say, "I am."

ELLEN: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

TEACHER: "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"

JOHNNY: "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."

4. A shopkeeper was dismayed when a brand new business much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read 'BEST DEALS.' He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading 'LOWEST PRICES.' The shopkeeper panicked, until he got an idea. He put the biggest sign of all over his own shop. It read... 'MAIN ENTRANCE'.

ahaha. :D i am grinning like the mad cheshire cat now. off to celebrate my drunken high!

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.

gravel grovel. they really do!

2008-05-27T18:44:00.002+08:00

imagine this.
you are at the hull of the boat, taking control.
you cruise along the river, taking in the view, experiencing all kinds of dangerous whirlpools, all sorts of deadly undertows, and of course, the ever- present calm waters.
you then spot a treasure chest.
curiosity got the better of you, and you picked it up, placing it carefully in your boat.
however, after some time, you found that the sheer weight of it was hindering your progress.
there was no other choice, was there?
so you grabbed a rope, tied the chest to the boat, and bobbed it along as you rowed.

this way, you could pick up a little more treasure that what you would have got if you'd chose to put everything IN the boat.

the human body is not a machine. there is only so much one can take, really. yet, the choice of maximizing oppurtunities given is always up to us, because ultimately, we are the captains of our life's ships. i've just realised, that sometimes, instead of piling everything unto oneself or clutching on to something for a long time, it might be better to let some go, let some loose.

loving too hard is not always the better choice.
because in the end, there will be another party neglected.

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.
you kiss the lilies one last time, knowing that next spring they will bloom red, stained with the blood of Death's soul

2008-04-12T22:31:00.003+08:00

this doesnt sound like me.
but since when have i ever been truly myself?

i need a time to curl up under the covers and cry till there's nothing left, then i'll scream.
maybe the world will hear then.
maybe they will then start to care.

maybe i've held the tears in for so long, i've forgotten how to cry.

je t'aime,ac.ies perfecto.
i'm sorry i let you down.
let.me.cry.

2008-04-05T15:44:00.002+08:00

today is FIESTA's one week aniversary!
and this is my 50th post.
what a celebration.

march 29th was great, really.
except for the fact that i was sweating buckets even in my cheer uniform, and that being next to 4G's illegal satay spot didnt help either. (Dont worry 4G, you know i love your stall, i bought 8 sticks ((:) hahah.

the point that FIESTA was so great actually made my hangover worse.

I miss drillings.
and the way they made us all sweat and sticky.
and gym practices.
and making poms.
and getting crazy YOOing during soulja boy.

and lots of other things that are now stored away in my heart.

I will never forget how cold the albeniz room was. (*grins)
Nor the jellies i got in my knees as we ran out onto the track.
Or how our hair looked like the size of our heads (if not bigger) <3
Or.
Or.

why is it that we learn to fully appreciate something after it ends?

i know that there were people who said that the routine wasnt as polished as the seniors'. but we tried. we gave it our best. and i think that that's what matters most. to do something fully with your heart, and not leave any regrets as you do the finale.

i remember.
clearly.
every single detail of the morning.
i taste.
slowly.
the bitter sense of loss, the sweet recalls.
they conflict.
i hear.
with my heart.
the memories fighting to be heard in my mind.

the night is silent.
the kind of silence, that presses you from the backs of your knees, and fills your throat, suffocating you.
and suddenly i see myself in my mind.

'she' is sitting beside a chest, sifting through its contents.
'she' picks the topmost envelope, which was smeared a dark red.
'she' rips it open.
out fall pictures and pictures all blotched with tears.
the faces are blurred beyond recognition, but her heart tells her who they are.
and 'she' remembers.

i feel my restraint giving in.
and with a final tug of memories, i discover that some emotions were never meant to be cooped up.
my vision turns liquid,
but i am still able to admire
the way the moon casts its light
softly
on the gold and silver puffs lying in the corner.

if only there was a way to relive it again.

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.
i see my heart as fragments in the sky, and when it rains, i taste my tears.

2008-03-16T08:59:00.002+08:00

You Are a Semi-Colon

You are elegant, understated, and subtle in your communication.
You're very smart (and you know it), but you don't often showcase your brilliance.

Instead, you carefully construct your arguments, ideas, and theories â€“ until they are bulletproof.
You see your words as an expression of yourself, and you are careful not to waste them.

You friends see you as enlightened, logical, and shrewd.
(But what you're saying often goes right over their heads.)

You excel in: The Arts

You get along best with: The Colon

What Punctuation Mark Are You?

yes((: the arts.

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto
her gummy escape.

2008-02-09T23:02:00.000+08:00

14.5 years of wonderful memories and experiences created.
14.5 years of lessons rightfully learnt.
14.5 years of dreams harbored.

How many years left to capture life's unforgettables with my mind?
How many years left to love?
How many years left to fulfill the fantasies, to put on those wings of success, to soar?
How many years left to reach those dreams?

Most importantly...
Will there ever be a day when i can look back on my whole reel of life, smile; and at the end say:
I braved and I persevered?
I did what i loved?
I pursued what I longed?

I lived life to the fullest?

Maybe this is what growing up is like-

a little bit of sour and a little bit of spice
a little bit of salty and a little bit of nice

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.
in the end i wanna be standing at the beginning, with you.

she's so lucky, she's a star.

2008-02-06T19:08:00.000+08:00

ladies and gentlemen,
drumroll please.

i have an important announcement to make.

is everyone listening?
(YES.)
* i will only accept this answer, and nothing else.
will the mister over there stop poking at his iphone?
thank you.

all eyes here please.
the lady in the house will appear soon.

excuse me?
miss, please stop playing footsies with the mister beside you.
you may flirt all you want after the announcement.
but just in case you didnt know, he's married.
and his wife is talking to you right now.
THAT'S ME.

the lady arrives, enters the hall.

a very warm welcome to the party, my beloved guests.
i have an announcement to make, as my dear friend would've already told you minutes before.

-
i finally learnt how to upload blogskin images, and have successfully changed my blogskin.
-

(CLAPS.)
oh, certainly, you may cheer your hearts out if you want.
i am very delighted at this, just so you know.
thank you all for your utmost support.

this calls for a toast, dont you think?
perhaps it even deserves a lovely celebration.

now, may the party begin.

the lady smiles, and exits through the teak doors of the hall.

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.
i will believe that miracles are queuing up to happen.

2008-02-06T17:31:00.000+08:00

wenyi is feeling a little bit crazy nowadays.

SHE DISCOVERS:

1. that she is starting to love 3 grace more and more
2. that suddenly sec3 might not be so bad after all (remove this sentence when exams come)
3. that she seems to neglect posting a lot 'cause her posts have not reached 50 yet :/
(but that's just because she's a good girl and doesn't spent all her time online (:)
4. that she still cannot figure out how to upload blogskin pictures even after much patient verbal
coaching from pros like jiayu
5. that social studies ain't going to be her forte anytime soon
6. that she can act out english spelling words!
7. that she misses drama tremendously
8. that she enjoys the feeling of being mad, 'cause she thinks it relieves stress
9. that she can sing "big big girl' pretty well, as her phone managed to TRACK- IDed it!
10. that so far, all the words in the sentences above after the word "that" start with the letter "s"
11. that she wouldn't mind being lame and toot till 99

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto
i created my dream and went after it, just for you.

2007-12-16T00:37:00.000+08:00

i got influenced by weiqing and her "depressing msn nicknames" post. (yup weiqing feel honoured that your post is my inspiration :D)

okay well i went searching and found some really toot ones:

1. by the time you've read this, you've already read it. (so it might as well not be put up, since its stating the obvious -.-) (but i still like it. hahas)

2. i'm never wrong. there was once when i thought i was wrong, but i was mistaken. (uh correct me if i'm wrong, lady, but you were wrong right there and then.)

3. my fake plants died because i didn't pretend to water them. ( and then you'll tell me your parrot died because it didn't know how to say "i'm hungry".)

4. children in the dark cause accidents, accidents in the dark cause children. (does this belong to the email account- parentinghelp@____.com? ;) )

5. two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights do make a left. ( !!!... )

6. nobody is perfect. i am nobody. therefore i am perfect. (a definite ego- inflator)

7. Alcohol might not be the answer, but it helps you to forget the question ( this one DOES make a lot of sense. :p)

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto
"i feel it, as her heart stops beating beneath my palm-- that tiny loss of rhythm, that hollow calm, that utter loss."

2007-12-07T22:36:00.000+08:00

i stared at the screen for 5 minutes straight, my mind churning with all the things i wanted to say to drama class.
but when i placed my fingers above my keyboard, nothing flowed out.
nothing. and the empty space hung there, a reminder of what used to be.
there are too few words to describe the feeling drama injects into my heart, the way it colours my life, and teaches me more things then what i would learn in 14 years.
i cannot put into humble words this completeness i feel inside.

but to sum it all up, thank you. ( i know it's cliche, but it IS true)
thank all of you for being what you guys are, a great friend, a wonderful partner, an awesome mentor (this applies especially to mr wong :D).
thank you for being there, for giving me dreams, for teaching me how to dream again.

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.
words simply do not equate feelings

*shoot. i'm tearing. :'/

little miss profound

2007-11-20T23:39:00.000+08:00

they lurk.

somewhere in the shadows, fingers pointing, lips curling. the stage where you convince yourself that you really couldn't care less, is the time the taunts start all over. every word is a poisoned dart, every syllable a bulls- eye on your most sensitive issues.

they sneer.

the words slowly break through the careful wall of defence you've painstakingly constructed with every ounce of your courage, charging at full force towards your final barrier. the mental trench. you stand firm, stand tall.

they smirk.

it is always dangerous to underestimate them. the final card is laid on the table with a sly smile brimming with confidence. nothing stops halfway. the dirty tricks appear, and crumble not only your mental strengths, but also you, to pieces. history replays itself, and you now have a new heart to mend, a new mindset to create.

they stare.

you slink into a corner, tears silently coursing your cheeks, inwardly hating yourself for being such a coward. you hide this side of you to the world, but when you think the night is silent and the room empty, you take off the mask, letting true emotions take control. and they stare, challenging you to retaliate, yet knowing you never will.

they wait.

wounds heal faster than memories can fade. they take their time, like the lion playing with its food, putting the poor creature through minutes of excruciating torture before delivering the fatal blow swiftly. they watch, soundlessly, as you piece back the remnants of your heart. and when the final piece is in place, they'll strike. again.

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.

a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness.

all the way to random come.

2007-11-15T15:51:00.000+08:00

hmm.
the past week has been a blur of sleeping, reading, spacing out, proposal- creating, student councillors' investiture rehearsing, "LUMEN" dance- ing, and to top it all, today's prize- giving ceremony rehearsing.

blah blah.:/ really tiring, but truthfully, i kinda enjoyed all these.

i love lumen. i love SC08.

AND right now, i'm happy (:

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.
fall down seven, stand up eight.

P/s: i cannot understand vhat on earth jacintha lee is writing. french is not my native language, cherie.

2007-11-10T16:45:00.000+08:00

A woman goes to the local psychic in hopes of contacting her dearly departed grandmother. The psychic's eyelids begin fluttering, her voice begins warbling, her hands float up above the table, and she begins moaning.
Eventually, a coherent voice emanates, saying, "Granddaughter? Are you there?"
The customer, wide-eyed and on the edge of her seat, responds, "Grandmother? Is that you?"
"Yes granddaughter, it's me."
"It's really, really you, grandmother?", the woman repeats.
"Yes, it's really me, granddaughter."
The woman looks puzzled, "You're sure it's you, grandmother?"
"Yes, granddaughter, I'm sure it's me."
The woman pauses a moment, "Grandmother, I have just one question for you."
"Anything, my child."
"Grandmother, when did you learn to speak English?"

hahaha.

Dear Manager (HR),
Bob Smith, my assistant programmer, can always be found
hard at work in his cubicle. Bob works independently,without
wasting company time talking to colleagues. Bob never
thinks twice about assisting fellow employees, and he always
finishes given assignments on time. Often Bob takes extended
measures to complete his work, sometimes skipping coffee
breaks. Bob is a dedicated individual who has absolutely no
vanity in spite of his high accomplishments and profound
knowledge in his field. I firmly believe that Bob can be
classed as a high-caliber employee, the type which cannot be
dispensed with. Consequently, I duly recommend that Bob be
promoted to executive management, and a proposal will be
sent away as soon as possible.

Signed - Project Leader

A MEMO WAS SOON SENT FOLLOWING THE LETTER:
Dear Manager (HR),
That stupid idiot was reading over my shoulder when I wrote the report sent to you earlier today. Kindly read only the odd lines 1,3,5,7,9,11,13 for my true assessment of him.

Signed - Project Leader

*stroke of genius.:D

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto
credits:jokediary.com

unhurried thoughts

2007-10-29T21:25:00.001+08:00

this post has no particular topic whatsoever. disclaimer: you probably should stop reading right now unless you want to die of boredom minutes later ;D

I suddenly had a thought.
People really shouldn't define "laughter" as the best MEDICINE, you know.
Whenever i look at the word "medicine", the first thought that enters my mind is one of unpleasant-ness and icky sickly pinkish goo. it doesnt really fit with the cheery image of laughing, really. who in their right mind would laugh when they take their medicine?

Why not laughter is the best CURE instead? ((:

okay, there's this really funny thing that happened today.
i just finished my dinner with my family and burger king, and we were walking to my dad's car. Me, being so full to the point of throwing up (i kid you not), was lagging behind with my sister.
Just as we were walking past this pile of rubbish, my sister jumped clear of some black insect skittling about on the floor.

And that insect, which the really *smart* wenyi had mistook for a harmless beetle, turned out to be a cockroach.

the cockroach scuttled over to wenyi's shoe.
wenyi, the unfortunate possesor of slow reflexes, stupidly stood there for half a second while the cockroach's feelers waved up in greeting.
wenyi jumped to the left.
the cockroach, obviously smitten with my brown sneaker, moved LEFT.
wenyi screamed.
And finally had the sense to jump STRAIGHT.
the cockroach gave up wooing wenyi's sneaker, and moved to its rubbish haven.

end of story.

;DDDD

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto
i live with the constant fear of not knowing when can i update again.

2007-10-29T00:16:00.000+08:00

Lately you have been asking me
if all my words are true
Don't you know I'll do anything for you
Sometimes I haven't been good to you
Sometimes I've made you cry
And I am sorry for everything
but I promise you girl
I promise you this

(chorus:)
When the blue night is over my face
on the dark side of the world in space
When I'm all alone with the stars above
you are the one I love
So there's no need to worry girl
My heart is sealed for you
And no one's gonna take it away
cos' I promise you girl
I promise you this

(chorus:)
When the blue night is over my face
on the dark side of the world in space
When I'm all alone with the stars above
you are the one I love
Your voice is calling to me in my dreams
My love is stronger than it's ever been

je t'aime,ac.ies perfecto
MY FIRST LYRICS POSTED!!

2007-10-28T23:49:00.000+08:00

yes!! i finally know how to upload pictures!!! and meiko shall have the honour of being the first picture ever to be uploaded here. danielle & lexi, you guys should know what am i talking about. i miss webber & denver, CO. a lot :/ anyway, whose shoes are those?

last year's picture. i have no idea why i put it here. hahas(:

make way, harry potter.

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto.
randomness can be addictive.

2007-10-28T14:47:00.000+08:00

i am finally back home. you cant imagine how wonderful that feels, really. anyway, i am very sorry to all those out there, (especially JACINTHA LEE :P) who feels that my skin is getting dead and dusty. it's not that i'm lazy to change it (well, that's only 1/4 of the reason), but its because the codes are all messed up! everytime i try to change a new skin, my posts will be all over the place :/ so, for your maximum viewing pleasure, my skin shall remain the same.... for now.
-grins-

je t'aime, ac.ies perfecto

by the time you notice it, its too late.

2007-10-26T23:59:00.000+08:00

You Are an Ice Cream Cake

Surprising, unique, and high maintenance.
You're one of a kind, and you don't want anyone to forget it.
You're fun in small doses, but it's easy for people to overdose on you!

What Kind of Cake Are You?

ice cream cake?
now i'm hungry.

You Should Learn Swedish

Fantastisk! You're laid back about learning a language - and about life in general.
Peaceful, beautiful Sweden is ideal for you... And you won't even have to speak perfect Swedish to get around!

What Language Should You Learn?

and i cant even spell "wow" in swedish. let alone speak it (:

You Are the Ace of Clubs

You go at everything in your life full force. You are a natural gambler.
Your life definitely has some extreme highs and lows, but you know how to ride out the low times.

A total adventure seeker, you are never satisfied by what's normal or ordinary.
You like to push limits and shock people. You're dramatic, but a drama queen.

Your life has been a wild ride so far. You have stories that people can barely believe.
And you're probably still young... with a lot of wild rides in front of you.

A gamble you should take: High stakes roulette

Your friends would describe you as: Crazy

Your enemies would describe you as: Demented

If you lived in Vegas, you would be: A high roller

What Playing Card Are You?

um. we had financial literacy today, and the lecturer was just explaining why we should never gamble. ever. especially on the roulette. then why is this box defying everything he said?

Caffe Vanilla Frappuccino

Smooth and sweet, you fit in to almost any crowd. No one would suspect you of being a coffee tweaker!

What Flavor Frappuccino Are You?

You Belong in London

You belong in London, but you belong in many cities... Hong Kong, San Francisco, Sidney. You fit in almost anywhere.
And London is diverse and international enough to satisfy many of your tastes. From curry to Shakespeare, London (almost) has it all!

What European City Do You Belong In?

whoohoo! maybe its the UK air in my blood (:

You Are New York

Cosmopolitan and sophisticated, you enjoy the newest in food, art, and culture.
You also appreciate a good amount of grit - and very little shocks you.
You're competitive, driven, and very likely to succeed.

Famous people from New York: Sarah Michelle Gellar, Tupac Shakur, Woody Allen

What American City Are You?

You Belong in Paris

Stylish and expressive, you were meant for Paris.
The art, the fashion, the wine!
Whether you're enjoying the cafe life or a beautiful park...
You'll love living in the most chic place on earth.

What City Do You Belong In?

je t'aime ac.ies perfecto
just a little midnight snack.

breathing the motorway

lace up your shoes,

You could curl up inside the fishtank to sleep

i've got my mind open open close-

Jay eh ee, oh my jay eh ee.

clasp a prayer within,

(untitled)

Curl your toes:

Happy twentyten :-)

手指间的回忆:

let in snow let it snow let it snow <3

hush little baby dont you cry.

only the heart can feel.

Why dont you dare to look in a mirror?

you have to go there to come back

of high heels and video stills/ of sleeping at 4am and waking up feeling like grumpy the dwarf

pinafore on for the last time:

we could scatter stardust by the meadow-

salvage the lost, save the empty.

& everyone needs a pocketful of sunshine

calling a dreamer/

stiffen that upper lip-

the length of our promise:

four days will quickly steep themselves in night

our last sprintable stretch

(a+b) (a-b)

navy blues and perfect whites

breathless sway

in the span of one question?

emotions you have come to fear the most

shh, just watch the fireworks,

all tomorrow's parties

ours and yours

dead man's hand

maybe this was how icarus felt

wash away, my sanity.

who knew 39 so different would turn out to be something special?

let me tell you the story of a lil' girl, ay.

grandpa's girl.

so here's ride number sixteen for you, a wild one, lady.

so speak for me, love.

thou shalt not cry on grad day.

lady of the night.

got your back, girl.

i got that right back in my face, young man.

to waltz with you on the street when its snowing--

the ferris-wheel

for one more day. xx, forev and always.

kiss the flecks, baby

whoop-dee-doop!

swept away, ah yes.

JUST PLANE DEAD!

hey hermoine, i need your time- turner.

inspired by shawn johnson.

ah rowling, i hereby quoteth thee

a tissue for you, frou frou.

yakkity yak!

the ferris-wheel

for grandpa,

to you, and you. *jabs finger into thin air*

pictures tell, but its not the words kind of say.

because all the time i was living a lie.

boy,i killed your image one day.

i dont think distress needs a title,eh.

le' encounter blunder

eh, i thought it was, but we never were.

phishdish.

08 summer olympics

she's so lucky, she's a star.

little miss profound

all the way to random come.

unhurried thoughts

to you, and you. jabs finger into thin air